Story time

[centre mid]

.. I'm currently on a back to work scheme along with Rico, Roddy &....

[Paddyfield]

...Bertie." Just then Roddy drove past in a tractor on his way to....

[centre mid]

.. Donnybrook, his s hit for shovelling in toe. Whilst stopped at a traffic light he noticed that....

[Tir Oilean]

phat Dolan was sitting in a convertible beside him eating a twix, Roddy shouted..."Oi.......

[Block G Raptor]

Dolan you Fat Fcuk" and then turned on the muck spreader burying dolan and his new convertable in two and a half tons of manure which funnily enough is the exact ammount of manure that was used to ..................

[placid casual]

cover the rose garden in liam lawlor's back garden. liam had "acquired" land but felt it was justified cos he was a northsides looking out for his own interests. and shure dere's nuthin wrong wit dat eh !!
on the sunny southside,where young girls with too much make-up on and their hair backcombed, paraded the avenues in their dubes ,the police were called to a house to investigate a call that an ugly man had somehow found his way to the wrong side of the city and the locals were scared cos he spoke in a funny accent and wore a tracksuit that made him look like an extra from the "thriller" video.
it turned out to be non other than......

[OwlsFan]

....Eamon Dunphy who was in flagrante delicto with Bill O'Herlihy. "Okey dokey" said Bill, "you can put that away now Eamon and we'll have a look at the replay". Giles was sitting watching the two go at it and said "I know I am repeating myself but...."

[Paddyfield]

...I know I am repeating myself". Dolan got out of his car and Roddy got off his tractor and they both had a .......

[placid casual]

look at bill and eamo hammering away on each other.
roddy said"if i was mamaging dem fellahs, they'd be finished by njow"
phat pat looked mournfull and stammered out"i havent seen my little fella since 1985".
"dere dere" said roddy and he comforting phat pat with a tap on the shoulder .
billo jumped up and legged it into the next garden with eamon in hot pursuit shouting "dont jump the fence baby!". the owner of the house came out with a broom and a .........

[Paddyfield]

...life size cardboard cut out of Roddy Collins which is used for.....

[Block G Raptor]

Scaring away the neighborhood schooligans....................

[OwlsFan]

Scaring away the neighborhood schooligans....................

but this time it worked on Dunphy who thought it was a picture of himself and he legged it in the direction of...

[placid casual]

the horsehoe bar in the shelbourne hotel.
dunphy cowered under a large table in the bar muttering "save me baby,im a personality in this town dontchaknow"
under the table alongside dunphy was none other than barry egan the ginger -haired ****$tain from the sindo. barry was researching for a story for his paper on how young socialites ended up "on the coke loike youknow" and invariably ended up face down in their own vomit on the floor of the horsehoe bar.
"you look like that tw@t mick hucknall" said dunphy
"you look like a camel" said egan ,then both ordered black russians from the bar and proceeded to try and talk over each other about how important they were to irish society unaware that in a nearby corner lurked .....

[Paddyfield]

...two white Russians who were in Dublin for trials with Bohemians but they....

[Block G Raptor]

were brutal so they signed for Rovers instead, that very week on MNS Roddy claimed "I brought them over from Russia", he was promptly arrested and faces charges of Human Trafficking but he's not too worried as been defended by...................................

[gustavo]

......Giovanni di Stefano but then Di Stefano abandoned Roddy on regards of Roddy being too much of a lowlife for him to defend, this left Roddy in a pickle , but he decided to defend himself , which was all going well as he spent the previous night watching Perry Mason in his local , the sound was off but he got the gist of it , Unfortunatelty for Roddy when he arrived it turned out Judge Snyder was taking the case and that the judge has had it in for him ever since he accidentally...

[Block G Raptor]

............Relegated Shamrock Rovers. When it was Roddy's turn to call his first witness he called...................

[OwlsFan]

............Relegated Shamrock Rovers. When it was Roddy's turn to call his first witness he called...................

...was Heinrich Himmler. "What's your name? " asked Judge Snyder to which Himmler replied "Ve ask de questions". Judge Snyder soon tired of answering Himmler's questions about the Judge's gene pool and then called Phat Dolan who....

[Paddyfield]

...just retuned from Tesco where he bought....

[OwlsFan]

...just retuned from Tesco where he bought....

6 chocolate eclairs, 14 packets of Nachos and 2 apple pies which he finished off just in 10 minutes flat just before he was due to appear as a panelist on Setanta Sports where the game was Sligo Rovers vs St. Pat's. Dolan predicted that.............

[Paddyfield]

...the Dollar would weaken even further because.....

[rambler14]

he ate some for breakfast and washed it all down with a barrel of oil which had been flown over to Ireland in a plane flown by....................

[OwlsFan]

he ate some for breakfast and washed it all down with a barrel of oil which had been flown over to Ireland in a plane flown by....................

John Giles who shouted down to Dolan "Now I don't like to repeat myself but the bread and butter of flying is to do the simple things. Keep control and..". Dolan interrupted him "Did you say bread and butter!! ?That reminds me I have eaten for 5 seconds and he rushed in to the nearest greasy spoon and to his surprise he met

[Paddyfield]

...Dermot Keely, who headbutted Dolan because Keely will never forget the manner in which Dolan once.....

[rambler14]

...Dermot Keely, who headbutted Dolan because Keely will never forget the manner in which Dolan once.....

farted in his face in the toilet of a buger bar run by

[Paddyfield]

....Ronald McDonald but Dolan prefers Aberakebabera because.....

[OwlsFan]

....Ronald McDonald but Dolan prefers Aberakebabera because.....


he thinks they're made in Aberdeen so he flew over to Pittodrie to take in a game against Rangers and was shocked to find....

[Paddyfield]

... Roddy had applied for the job as Rangers' manager; he later told Con Murphy on MNS that he is.....

[BohsPartisan]

... Roddy had applied for the job as Rangers' manager; he later told Con Murphy on MNS that he is.....

...a ladyboy at weekends.

[rambler14]

in Brazil were.............

[biscuit]

Eamon Dunphy was caught shagging a brazzer in some high classed joint owned by.....

[Block G Raptor]

Ronaldo.. In revenge Dunphy conspired to set up ronaldo (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/7374689.stm)

[rambler14]

but he got caught by a journalist working for The Irish Independent and as a result was on the front page the next day standing next to 3 ladyboys and a..........

[placid casual]

gallon tin of custard.
"me and de bhoys here, we're off for a bit of food fun,you wanna join us", the picture seemed to say.
what eamo didnt know was that giles and brady were winging it over to his place desperate for a bit of ladyboy action,with giles talking in brady's ear the whole time about "honesty of effort being the starting point for any good romp".
brady interrupted giles to ask him if he'd invited .........

[see's it]

jimmy armfield

[Paddyfield]

...but Roddy Collins arrived instead as he couldn't take a management job in Scotland because he really loves......

[forza rovers]

plastering in dublin and thinking he knows about footie on mns........

[forza rovers]

*bump*
roddy has decided for a change of scenery and decides to head off to Siberia to restart his managing career and......

[rambler14]

takes charge of Siberia Wanderers which is a team made up of nymphomaniac eskimos who are actually quite good even though............

[Paddyfield]

...Pat Dolan described them as " ......."........

[OwlsFan]

...Pat Dolan described them as " ......."........


.."a bit tight at the back" which is no good for nymphomaniac eskimos. Meanwhile Avram Grant, recently sacked by Chelsea, went for an interview as manager of Cobh Ramblers and who should he meet but...

[forza rovers]

.."a bit tight at the back" which is no good for nymphomaniac eskimos. Meanwhile Avram Grant, recently sacked by Chelsea, went for an interview as manager of Cobh Ramblers and who should he meet but...tom telling him that they will stay up.......

[Paddyfield]

meanwhile, Tony Cousins applied for a new job at.....

[OwlsFan]

Burger King but they told him he was too....

[Paddyfield]

Burger King but they told him he was too....

...late because they Burger King hired....

[OwlsFan]

...late because Burger King hired....

Pat Dolan. Alas for Burger King their profits immediately took a dive because Dolan...

[forza rovers]

Pat Dolan. Alas for Burger King their profits immediately took a dive because Dolan... had ate a years stock in one week.....

[centre mid]

had ate a years stock in one week.....
...even though he had left room for desert.........

[OwlsFan]

...even though he had left room for dessert.........

which consisted of

[Calcio Jack]

which consisted of

... a large slice of green humble pie that had been baked by....