"Cool" bands that actually suck

[Lionel Ritchie]

Okay kids I'm feeling bitchy. What "Cool" bands do you think are or were just awful. You know the ones I mean. The type of thing Tom Dunne plays because Q magazine tells him he should ..nay must Like. The types students with more money than sense pay 150 quid to watch on a big screen in a godforesaken field in Kildare while waving their event sponsor t-shirt over their head and ignoring the fact they didn't bring sunblock.

Or ....Maybe it's a particular record that's gained iconoclastic status (rumour has it that both Fleetwood Macs Rumours and Van Morrisons Astral Weeks suck balls;) )

Leave the pop stuff, the talent show contestants, the boybands, the R'n'B types and the Robbies down the drain with some nice caustic soda where they belong.

I'll get the ball rolling shall I? .....

The Bravery Jeeeeeeeesus wept!!! They apparently "evoke the new wave cool of The Cure, New Order and latter day Television".
My hole they do!!! Looking like something out of a 1986 wella advert and sounding like they're tearing the hole out of Duran Durans 'Planet Earth' more like. Evoking nothing but a desire in me to slap them a headbut.

Oasis I never got Oasis. Three good songs in twelve years (and probably not the three that came into your head) does not a good band make. Bland banal pub rock with lyrics that'd make a cheeky girl blush. Oh and a talentless cnut for a lead singer who's apparently charismatic because he puts his hands behind his back and leans into the microphone.

U2 I never got U2 either. Very orrdinary, unremarkable songs ...normally semi-lifted from a decent song by someone else. I heard a scouser opine recently that as far as he's concerned they're "still a 3rd division Bunnymen". I'd go with that.

Snow Patrol I just find yer mans middle class Belfast accent a bit of a low register Brian Kennedy after a verse and a half. (though I commend him for the fact you can tell where he's from in his singing voice ...kudos for that only). Beyond that there must be a picture of these guys next to the word 'Twee' in the dictionary. ...and referring to the love interest in yer songs as 'my dear' (or maybe it's a deer:eek: )? It's unmanly I tells ya.:confused:

R.E.M. see U2 -but substituting the word 'Bunnymen' for 'Go-Betweens'

[Lim till i die]

Do the Kaiser Chiefs count as "Cool"? Themselves and Babyshambles and the vast majority of the new English nonsense at the moment pi$$ me right off. It's all been done several decades ago, far better.

[Dublin12]

Coldplay
Franz Ferdinand
Kaiser Chiefs
The Frames
David Gray
Damien Dempsey
Bloc Party

[Lionel Ritchie]

yessssssssss!!! that's the idea!!!!!!!!! We're on the right track! Keep 'em coming!

Damien Rice puttin' yer anaemic bird on a barstool next to you and singing songs about how she''s made a complete pussy out of you ....what a bunch of @rse!!!!!!!!!!!!

[gustavo]

never got the Libertines meself

[paul_oshea]

U2 I never got U2 either. Very orrdinary, unremarkable songs ...normally semi-lifted from a decent song by someone else. I heard a scouser opine recently that as far as he's concerned they're "still a 3rd division Bunnymen". I'd go with that.

couldnt agree more and any of those hippy type bands around these days with either wasitcoats or suits/tight tshirts and tight jeans and hair not one way/length or the other. all crap.

[Soper]

Every band and artist in the world, except the ones which I like!

[Lionel Ritchie]

Every band and artist in the world, except the ones which I like!

It's glorious!!!!!!:D

[Bully Bull]

Could be open to ridicule but 'The Beatles'

[dahamsta]

Green Day

[tetsujin1979]

Never really got Guns N Roses, probably more to do with Axl than anything, cause I listen to Velvet Revolver a lot.
Apparently The Darkness are reviving the theatrics in rock. Are they bo11ox, they're a bad Queen tribute act that got lucky
Could someone please shoot Fred Durst?

[Macy]

The Beatles would be my main one.
Oasis post Definitely Maybe.
The Seahorses, but think everyone sussed them quick.
Damien Dempsey
Pete Doherty
In fact there's loads of the current crop that are hyped - but I blame the NME which is essentially the music version of The Sun. Build em up to knock them down - we love it.

[finlma]

The Darkness - terrible music.

[The Good Son]

You know the ones I mean. The type of thing Tom Dunne plays because Q magazine tells him he should ..nay must Like.
Can I include Tom Dunnes own Something Happens. I don't know if they could ever have been classified as cool, but God they were always rubbish.

[Pauro 76]

never liked the Divine Comedy - his posh voice really fecks me off!
Keane - is the lead singer a hobbit?
easy target but the likes of multi-millionaire corporate geeks masquerading as rock stars venting their angst'. Limp Bizkit, Korn, Offspring and the likes... Fred Durst apparantly is 'associate director' of a record company. Wheres the angst in that?

[Lionel Ritchie]

To be fair to Neil Hannon -he talks that way too.

True about Fred Durst ...ditto yer boy from Offspring.

[the 12 th man]

Mercury Rev
The Thrills

[noby]

Mercury Rev started out as a "Sucky band that are actually cool", but along the way turned into a "Cool band that actually suck".

When the original singer, Baker, left/was kicked out the nme likened it to Cannon leaving Ball, ie who gives a f***. Somewhere along the way, nme changed their tune.

[superfrank]

Kaiser Chiefs
The Darkness
The Libertines
Babyshambles
Robbie Williams

[Lionel Ritchie]

Careful now -Robbie isn't "cool". i.e. you're unlikely to see a guy down the student union wearing a Robbie T-shirt unless...

a) he's making a failed stab at irony
b) it's in a seminary
c) it's in the garda training college

[Dublin12]

Robbie Williams

Read the 3rd paragraph from Lionel's opener again;),I agree with everything else you put though.

[Roo69]

Okay kids I'm feeling bitchy. What "Cool" bands do you think are or were just awful. You know the ones I mean. The type of thing Tom Dunne plays because Q magazine tells him he should ..nay must Like. The types students with more money than sense pay 150 quid to watch on a big screen in a godforesaken field in Kildare while waving their event sponsor t-shirt over their head and ignoring the fact they didn't bring sunblock.

Or ....Maybe it's a particular record that's gained iconoclastic status (rumour has it that both Fleetwood Macs Rumours and Van Morrisons Astral Weeks suck balls;) )

Leave the pop stuff, the talent show contestants, the boybands, the R'n'B types and the Robbies down the drain with some nice caustic soda where they belong.

I'll get the ball rolling shall I? .....

The Bravery Jeeeeeeeesus wept!!! They apparently "evoke the new wave cool of The Cure, New Order and latter day Television".
My hole they do!!! Looking like something out of a 1986 wella advert and sounding like they're tearing the hole out of Duran Durans 'Planet Earth' more like. Evoking nothing but a desire in me to slap them a headbut.

Oasis I never got Oasis. Three good songs in twelve years (and probably not the three that came into your head) does not a good band make. Bland banal pub rock with lyrics that'd make a cheeky girl blush. Oh and a talentless cnut for a lead singer who's apparently charismatic because he puts his hands behind his back and leans into the microphone.

U2 I never got U2 either. Very orrdinary, unremarkable songs ...normally semi-lifted from a decent song by someone else. I heard a scouser opine recently that as far as he's concerned they're "still a 3rd division Bunnymen". I'd go with that.

Snow Patrol I just find yer mans middle class Belfast accent a bit of a low register Brian Kennedy after a verse and a half. (though I commend him for the fact you can tell where he's from in his singing voice ...kudos for that only). Beyond that there must be a picture of these guys next to the word 'Twee' in the dictionary. ...and referring to the love interest in yer songs as 'my dear' (or maybe it's a deer:eek: )? It's unmanly I tells ya.:confused:

R.E.M. see U2 -but substituting the word 'Bunnymen' for 'Go-Betweens'


It's all about personal choice and tastes in music....... Saying U2 suck or are not a good band is daft IMO

[Dublin12]

It's all about personal choice and tastes in music....... Saying U2 suck or are not a good band is daft IMO

Please.please,please get up off yer knees,I can see a 6 pager coming out of this:p

[superfrank]

Careful now -Robbie isn't "cool". i.e. you're unlikely to see a guy down the student union wearing a Robbie T-shirt unless...

a) he's making a failed stab at irony
b) it's in a seminary
c) it's in the garda training college
I thought cool meant the media try to make everyone think he's cool.

[Roo69]

Please.please,please get up off yer knees,I can see a 6 pager coming out of this:p

I like them, always have. Just don't see how a band that has produced tracks such as with or without you, october, lemon, one, pride, new years day, sunday bloody sunday, i will follow etc.... can be considered to "suck" " yeah a lot of people don't like Bono personally but they are top class tunes

[Schumi]

Are The Darkness 'cool'? If so I nominate them.

[Lionel Ritchie]

I thought cool meant the media try to make everyone think he's cool.

In fairness you're correct and the so called "alternative" media have a substantial case to answer in relation to their critical re-evaluation of his total output in a more favourable light and general revisionism towards his career but NO NO NO lets not let this decend in to an RW thread. Sure he's nothing but a song robbing shaved ape of a cnut!!!:eek: :D

Keep 'em cool ...and be cruel!!! :cool:

[noby]

I like them, always have. Just don't see how a band that has produced tracks such as with or without you, october, lemon, one, pride, new years day, sunday bloody sunday, i will follow etc.... can be considered to "suck" " yeah a lot of people don't like Bono personally but they are top class tunes
They're (the songs) also all more than 15 years old.
They've sucked with the last decade.

[Lionel Ritchie]

I like them, always have. Just don't see how a band that has produced tracks such as ...


with or without you jesus I hate that fcuking song:mad:


october like the scouser said -3rd division Bunnymen


lemon ...to be fair -it's in complete compliance with all applicable trade and product descriptions acts


one good name alright ...Metallica had a song of the same name out three years previous -funny how that seems to happen a lot with U2.


pride not bad actually -though as a man in a great movie once said "even a stopped clock tells the right time twice a day"


new years day ...that'll be the second telling of the time then.


sunday bloody sunday nyih ...interesting drum-fill but it's essentially Hurricane or All Along the Watchtower slowed down or sped up a bit thereafter.


i will follow etc.... 3rd division Bunnymen B-SIDE

[ken foree]

They're (the songs) also all more than 15 years old.
They've sucked with the last decade.

i largely agree with that though a healthy chunk of zooropa was good (title track, lemon, stay, and dirty day the best), the batman song was v. good, electrical storm in a similar vein isn't bad. the pavarotti song miss sarajevo from Passengers is amazing, and that album is a fairly experimental idea for such a corporate group (fake soundtracks to fake albums), the re-imagining of the mission impossible theme you could include here.. a couple of songs from pop (gone and perhaps mofo), and a couple from elevation might further test your statement. but there is... so much crap from them on those albums as well.

[Hither green]

Most have them have already been said.

Oasis - never got that or why they made it so big.

The Darkness - surely they’re a novelty act, they were never meant to be cool.

Scissor Sisters - actually I don’t know much of their music but the whole kitsch is cool thing makes them seem a novelty act too. To me it’s just naff.

Take That - they weren’t cool the first time round. Why are we being told that they’re cool now that they've ran out of money and are making a comeback?

And lastly the controversial one, the Beatles. Not that I’m saying they were rubbish or anything, in fact I’ve very little opinion on their music but what I hate are the w@nkers like Chris Evans and Oasis going on and on about them. And the fact that half of all 16 year olds would probably call them the greatest band ever just because of Oasis and Chris Evans. They’ve probably never even listened to them. It’s a load of old bo11ox.

[Roo69]

3rd division Bunnymen B-SIDE

:rolleyes: Not a chance

[ken foree]

half of all 16 year olds would probably call them the greatest band ever just because of Oasis and Chris Evans. They’ve probably never even listened to them. It’s a load of old bo11ox.

i was a bit like that. i 'knew they were brilliant' but didn't know why. then i grew up. then i listened to them.

[Schumi]

Scissor Sisters - actually I don’t know much of their music but the whole kitsch is cool thing makes them seem a novelty act too. To me it’s just naff.
God yeah, I'd forgotten them. Absolutely terrible!

[wws]

U2 are fcking sh.t

and this has nothing to do with different people having different musical taste
just trust me on this they are ars.e cack

outside of their mega stadium multi media boll.ocks i just couldnt imagine anyone listening to their music on its own merits


its contrived pseudo political aural horse manure

[klein4]

the smiths
echo and the bunnymen
the happy mondays
blur
the gorillaz
the doors
the sex pistols
the libertines
arcade fire
nirvana
metallica

[ken foree]

U2 are fcking sh.t

and this has nothing to do with different people having different musical taste
just trust me on this they are ars.e cack

outside of their mega stadium multi media boll.ocks i just couldnt imagine anyone listening to their music on its own merits


its contrived pseudo political aural horse manure

ever seen them live? i've seen 'em about five times, very different than the recorded output. and i mean the actual songs, not the tomfoolery that goes on around them

[hamish]

Never really got Guns N Roses, probably more to do with Axl than anything, cause I listen to Velvet Revolver a lot.
Apparently The Darkness are reviving the theatrics in rock. Are they bo11ox, they're a bad Queen tribute act that got lucky
Could someone please shoot Fred Durst?

Every time that Sweet Child o' mine comes on VH1 Classic I lose the will to live. I can't stand Rose's whine but I must admit I do like the Terminator song..........a bit.

The Prodigy, Pete Doherty, Durst, The Streets, Ash, Eminem, Darkness etc etc bore the hole off me but, being an old f@rt, what would I know.:D

The likes of Maroon 5, Athlete, Embrace, Ash, make me want to kill.:D

That Futureheads song that starts with the silly lyrics involving clues drives me mental along with the riff lifted off The Knack's "My Sharona" - another sh!te band BTW

Must say I have a soft spot for Cradle of Filth:eek: It's not 'cos they're any good or anything........I just find them, particularly the lead "vocalist" , incredibly rediculous and funny.

[ken foree]

The Prodigy, Pete Doherty, Durst, The Streets, Ash, Eminem, Darkness etc etc bore the hole off me but, being an old f@rt, what would I know.:D


this is the whole point. the reason i generally refuse to slate these young bands is because i was young once (hah!), and loved primal scream, oasis, verve, charlatans, blur, fannies, underworld et al. but if you listen to older music, you often find similar things got done before much much better. it is now much more fun for me to listen to some droney folk or psych-noise freakout guitar (blue cheer anyone?) than listen to a verse-chorus-verse-chorus-guitar solo-chorus-outro thing where you can basically tell what's gonna happen next

[strangeirish]

Boomtown Rats.....cool at the time, but some daft music, with one or two exceptions.

[hamish]

this is the whole point. the reason i generally refuse to slate these young bands is because i was young once (hah!), and loved primal scream, oasis, verve, charlatans, blur, fannies, underworld et al. but if you listen to older music, you often find similar things got done before much much better. it is now much more fun for me to listen to some droney folk or psych-noise freakout guitar (blue cheer anyone?) than listen to a verse-chorus-verse-chorus-guitar solo-chorus-outro thing where you can basically tell what's gonna happen next

TBH Ken, I listen to a lot of folk and have attended many a Cambridge Folk Festival and some folk is awful but the best is really good. - like Dervish, Wolfestone, Rankins etc
Yeah, you're right, maybe I was being too harsh on the young bands and maybe they'll develop into something good too but the old grumpiness and impatience hits in sometimes - it's an age thing, I guess. LOL
It brings back to mind a story from the late 70s when we used to have rock bands here in Beeslow on Monday nights. The guvnor of the place where the gigs took place turned down an up and coming band from Dublin. He could have got them for around 80 quid (no kidding) but thought they were
sh!te.:D
A year or so later, that young band were number 1 in the UK with "Boy":eek:

Funny though, Ken, my godson and niece (Shakedown, 23, and Bubbles, 20) are always nicking my old rock CDs and albums. Y'know Rory Gallagher, Seger, early Genesis, Creedence, Purple, Moodies, Lizzy, etc etc etc etc 'cos they think they're better than today's bands.

BTW Ken check out Classic Rock magazine - it has some great stuff on the oldies plus the new ones too. Great read. latest issue has stuff on Creedence (very sad story) and the making of Genesis's "Lamb lies down on Broadway".

Happy New Year also - don't see you in Footie much these days.

[hamish]

Boomtown Rats.....cool at the time, but some daft music, with one or two exceptions.

Funny that, strangeirish, saw the Rats in Dalyer back in 78 or 79 supporting Lizzy. They were just breaking big and Geldof was hilarious on stage. They were terrific that day TBH.

What a line up that day, Lizzy, Graham Parker and The Rumour, Rats, Radiators from Space, a pre-Moving Hearts with Christy Moore plus loads of others.
:)

I also recall that day that the crowd was full of the RTE crowd. One newsreader was passing by (forget his name - he's not on now) and someone happened to push me and I stepped on a small carton of milk and sprayed the poor fcuker with its contents. TBF to the guy he was ok about it but I bet he smelt awful afterwards.

Jaysus, I'm turning into Abe Simpson.:D

[strangeirish]

LOL 'hamish. I saw StatusQuo and Judas Priest in '79? at Dalyer. I was fourteen and got pi**ed off my head on cider and then proceeded to get the sh*te kicked out of me by some rowdies. Classic.

Ah, dem wur de days.

[ken foree]

TBH Ken, I listen to a lot of folk and have attended many a Cambridge Folk Festival and some folk is awful but the best is really good. - like Dervish, Wolfestone, Rankins etc

i'll have to check them hamish, if they're anything like the incredible string band i'll probably love them. i like the american, the late john fahey, terrific finger-pick style.. and some of his modern-day progeny like six organs of admittance. 'avant folk' some are calling it, drony stuff, great.


Yeah, you're right, maybe I was being too harsh on the young bands and maybe they'll develop into something good too but the old grumpiness and impatience hits in sometimes - it's an age thing, I guess. LOL

ah come on, i feel the same. i *want* to have a dig at some music but then realize i don't have a leg to stand on, going back to the stuff i used to think was 'class'..


It brings back to mind a story from the late 70s when we used to have rock bands here in Beeslow on Monday nights. The guvnor of the place where the gigs took place turned down an up and coming band from Dublin. He could have got them for around 80 quid (no kidding) but thought they were
sh!te.:D
A year or so later, that young band were number 1 in the UK with "Boy":eek:

hahaa i bet there were more than a few others like him!


Funny though, Ken, my godson and niece (Shakedown, 23, and Bubbles, 20) are always nicking my old rock CDs and albums. Y'know Rory Gallagher, Seger, early Genesis, Creedence, Purple, Moodies, Lizzy, etc etc etc etc 'cos they think they're better than today's bands.

BTW Ken check out Classic Rock magazine - it has some great stuff on the oldies plus the new ones too. Great read. latest issue has stuff on Creedence (very sad story) and the making of Genesis's "Lamb lies down on Broadway".

Happy New Year also - don't see you in Footie much these days.

thanks and the same to you. i'm on here, reading more than writing. it was a similar experience for me as with your younger relations.. when i heard the door's "peacefrog" and realized it was basically the ENTIRE charlatans' catalogue wrapped up in one song, well.. not a little disillusionment settled in. and when you start hearing zep's catalogue under various states of altered consciousness..!:D i don't think i've heard of that mag, though mojo (british) is in a similar vein i believe. chrs, good to see you're enjoying foot.ie!

[hamish]

LOL 'hamish. I saw StatusQuo and Judas Priest in '79? at Dalyer. I was fourteen and got pi**ed off my head on cider and then proceeded to get the sh*te kicked out of me by some rowdies. Classic.

Ah, dem wur de days.

Jaysus, I was at that too strangeirish. I won two free tickets in some RTE competition even though my name wasn't read out as a winner.:D

Quo were pretty good that day - sounded more like a blues band than today.
Remember Rossi giving out about the sound - he said some thing like "Fcuking hell, the sound's like it's coming out from under a dustbin lid".

Remember too Rob Halford (JP) coming out on stage on a motor bike...driven by a roadie. Given Rob's legendary sexual preferences, I'd have been one worried roadie.:D

I was on the terrace opposite the stand but went down into the crowd later on.

Jaysus, O strange One, I thought you were much younger than that.:p

[ThatGuy]

I don't think Oasis are seen as "cool" now, and haven't been seen like that for about 10 years. However, I think that they are class and I love the band.

IMO the definitive answer to this question is the Libertines.

I like Led Zep but think they are hugely over-rated.

Very disappointed by some of the comments about the Beatles.

[hamish]

thanks and the same to you. i'm on here, reading more than writing. it was a similar experience for me as with your younger relations.. when i heard the door's "peacefrog" and realized it was basically the ENTIRE charlatans' catalogue wrapped up in one song, well.. not a little disillusionment settled in. and when you start hearing zep's catalogue under various states of altered consciousness..!:D i don't think i've heard of that mag, though mojo (british) is in a similar vein i believe. chrs, good to see you're enjoying foot.ie!

Yeah do like the ISB. Think they had a new album out lately.

This is the mag.

http://www.mygnr.com/news/1999/990601_1.htm

http://www.stevehackett.com/reviews/classicrock.html

You can get in in Easons.:)

Re your comments, the older rock bands had a greater musical background I feel from a wider variety of musical styles. John Lord of Purple used to play with a jazz oufit called the Artwoods while Blackmore played with a variety of different pop and rock outfits too.
Ditto Plant, Page, Gallagher and so on. Plant has a good folk pedigree. Remember his song Gallows Pole from a few years ago with Page?? Very folkie.

Meant that their music could include and go off into folk, blues, soul, rhythm and blues and so on.

[strangeirish]

Jaysus, is this a small world or what. Don't remember a lot from that day. Got tickets from a cousin. My mother didn't know I was there until the lads got me home, black and blue, not to mention locked. My Dad took it from there. 'Nuff said.

[hamish]

Jaysus, is this a small world or what. Don't remember a lot from that day. Got tickets from a cousin. My mother didn't know I was there until the lads got me home, black and blue, not to mention locked. My Dad took it from there. 'Nuff said.


LOL

I really am tempted to do a bit of slagging here but, I'm too nice, and I won't:D

[the 12 th man]

the smiths
echo and the bunnymen
the happy mondays
blur
the gorillaz
the doors
the sex pistols
the libertines
arcade fire
nirvana
metallica

You got to be joking ,I know you're entitled to your opinion but you're dissin a huge amount of quality Bands there....