I may be in a small minority here but I actually have a soft spot for Continuity Home Farm. It can’t be easy having no fans, and even worse little prospect of getting any fans either. I mean, suppose they get promoted this year (if they do make sure you keep your head down or you might get a slap from airborne bacon) their gates will swell but only because all the other Dublin teams will get another derby to replace the departed UCD. But whoever supports eL football has already got a team – calling your club Dublin City means you have a very low opinion of the average intelligence of the jackeen. “Oh, Dublin City! I’m a heroin addict so I must support them. But I won’t be able to travel down the country to those culchie teams like Shamrock Rovers, Shelbourne, Bohemians and St Pats.”

And according to reports, there is a slick marketing team behind Continuity Home Farm. They are even flogging jersies to tourists who have no idea what they are buying. I suppose it is the only official gear that Carroll’s actually sell. They provide TV highlights of their games to TV3 for the eL programme. A lot of people will tell you this is a positive thing for the first division. Rubbish. It’s the reason that TV3 have to show the programme at such a god-awful hour. Talk about video-nasties…

And I’m talking about their style of football, never mind the violence that breaks out at their matches. John Gill, their manager, is on a four month ban for getting stuck into a few Sligo Rovers players at their recent game in Whitehall. Because it was Sligo it’s hard to be too critical (we’d all like to give a few of them a slap) but Gill obviously has previous. I mean, he was wearing a suit at the time so he must have come straight from the courthouse.

In his defence Continuity Home Farm fans (okay, fan) point out that it was because the tackle that kicked it all off happened in front of the dug-outs (no pun intended). So what was Robbie Horgan’s excuse then? He’s their keeper. “Well your honour, I was just on my way back from the jacks when the row started and I was trying to separate the lads involved.”

Maybe the row was actually another example of the slick marketing that Continuity Home Farm get up to. As soon as that other shower of dirt birds, the Dublin Bogball team get knocked out, a “mill” happens at Whitehall. Any GAA-heads watching will be well up for a row with culchies. Coincidence? Maybe; maybe not.

So, while we used to hate Continuity Home Farm when they were first introduced to the market, nowadays we only feel sorry for them. There’s no Tony Sheridan to hate. It’s hard to get worked up with any of their players. But it’s still nice to give football lessons to jackeens so here’s to 3 more points for the real Blues on their way back to the top.