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Thread: Annoying ATM's

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    Seasoned Pro Block G Raptor's Avatar
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    Annoying ATM's

    really getting annoyed at ATM machines lately. tried to get €20 from an ATM just there and got the usual "please enter a multiple of €50" so decided to take out €100 for later and the feckin' thing gives me 5 feckin €20 note's like WTF why wouldn't it let me take out 20. I reckon its a conspiracy, the ATM was an AIB and my account was BOI are they trying to make me take as much money as possible from Bank of Ireland?

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    International Prospect jebus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Block G Raptor View Post
    really getting annoyed at ATM machines lately. tried to get €20 from an ATM just there and got the usual "please enter a multiple of €50" so decided to take out €100 for later and the feckin' thing gives me 5 feckin €20 note's like WTF why wouldn't it let me take out 20. I reckon its a conspiracy, the ATM was an AIB and my account was BOI are they trying to make me take as much money as possible from Bank of Ireland?
    AIB Banklinks are notorious for this sort of thing. They will rarely let you take out anything under €50, hit an Ulster banklink next time, they're usually alright

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    Seasoned Pro Block G Raptor's Avatar
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    Cheers will try that. althought the AIB is nearer and at Lunch-time every second counts

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    Viva El Presidente! sligoman's Avatar
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    Never mind notes, woman at ATM's annoy the feck out of me. They take so long it's ridiculous

    Rant over!
    Life without Rovers, it makes no sense...it's a heartache...nothing but a fools game. S.R.F.C.


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    Quote Originally Posted by sligoman View Post
    Never mind notes, woman at ATM's annoy the feck out of me. They take so long it's ridiculous

    Rant over!
    only thing worse is women paying at ticket machines in car parks
    "Some weeks the lady is good looking and some weeks they're not. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi". - Ian Holloway

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    Haha that's hilarious - "after years of abusive finger tapping without so much as a thank you ATMs get their own back on their aggressors".


    Can ATMs really be programmed that way though? As in to extract as much as possible from rival banks' accounts? Or is Brother Raptor being a little too conspiratorial? One thing Raptor, it said "only multiples of 50", which doesn't necessarily translate to "I've no €20 notes". Still fishy though.

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    Quote Originally Posted by kingdom hoop View Post
    Haha that's hilarious - "after years of abusive finger tapping without so much as a thank you ATMs get their own back on their aggressors".


    Can ATMs really be programmed that way though? As in to extract as much as possible from rival banks' accounts? Or is Brother Raptor being a little too conspiratorial? One thing Raptor, it said "only multiples of 50", which doesn't necessarily translate to "I've no €20 notes". Still fishy though.
    yip very easily too.
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    i took my 100 hundred euro few weeks back, had to fill out atm query form, and wait about 3 weeks, disaster
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    Seasoned Pro drinkfeckarse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sligoman View Post
    Never mind notes, woman at ATM's annoy the feck out of me. They take so long it's ridiculous

    Rant over!
    So true. When they actually get in front of it they spend the next 2 minutes digging around in their bag for their purse as if the thought just suddenly occured to them
    Top Breeders recommend drinkfeckarse....

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    Seasoned Pro Block G Raptor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by drinkfeckarse View Post
    So true. When they actually get in front of it they spend the next 2 minutes digging around in their bag for their purse as if the thought just suddenly occured to them
    New ATM Procedures

    A local bank is very pleased to announce that they are installing
    new Drive-thru ATMs where their customers will be able withdraw cash withoutleaving their vehicle.
    Male and Female procedures have been
    tailored to best reflect the behaviours of those particular groupings.

    PROCEDURE FOR MALE CUSTOMERS:

    1. Drive up to the ATM
    2. Open the car window
    3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN
    4. Enter amount of cash required and press "enter"
    5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt
    6. Close window
    7. Drive away

    PROCEDURE FOR FEMALE CUSTOMERS:

    1. Drive up to the ATM
    2. Reverse back the required distance to align car with ATM
    3. Re-start stalled engine
    4. Open the car window
    5. Find handbag, empty all contents onto the passenger seat and locate card
    6. Turn radio down & end call on cell phone
    7. Attempt to insert card into ATM
    8. Open car door to allow easier access to ATM due to excessive distance from car to ATM
    9. Insert card
    10. Re-insert card the right way up
    11. Ignore the sound of car horn from vehicle behind
    12. Search contents of handbag (on passenger seat) to locate diary with PIN written on the inside back page under "Date of Birth"
    13. Enter PIN
    14. Press "cancel" and re-enter PIN
    15. Enter amount of cash required and check make-up in rear view mirror
    16. Drum fingertips on steering wheel, look at ATM for one minute and
    then press "enter"
    17. Retrieve cash and receipt
    18. Search contents of handbag (on passenger seat) to locate purse and place cash inside
    19. Place receipt in back of cheque book
    20. Re-check make-up
    21. Drive forward two metres
    22. Reverse back to ATM ignoring the sound of car horn from vehicle behind
    23. Retrieve card
    24. Search contents of handbag (on passenger seat) to locate card holder
    and place card in an empty slot
    25. Drive two or three kilometres Release hand brake

  11. #11
    Seasoned Pro drinkfeckarse's Avatar
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    Good one
    Top Breeders recommend drinkfeckarse....

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    Or men...who start entering pin codes for phones and the likes. Some of us are in a rush to shop!
    Ever get the feelin' you have been cheated?

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    Viva El Presidente! sligoman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maz View Post
    Some of us are in a rush to shop!
    Those of you at ATM's obviously aren't!
    Life without Rovers, it makes no sense...it's a heartache...nothing but a fools game. S.R.F.C.


  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by sligoman View Post
    Those of you at ATM's obviously aren't!
    Excellent..

  15. #15
    First Team Maz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sligoman View Post
    Those of you at ATM's obviously aren't!
    What would you know....your communion money still underneath your mattress
    Ever get the feelin' you have been cheated?

  16. #16
    Viva El Presidente! sligoman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maz View Post
    What would you know....your communion money still underneath your mattress
    What were you doing in my room?
    Life without Rovers, it makes no sense...it's a heartache...nothing but a fools game. S.R.F.C.


  17. #17
    First Team Maz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sligoman View Post
    What were you doing in my room?
    Searching for your money!

    Back on track...men are just as bad if not worse than ladies at an atm
    Ever get the feelin' you have been cheated?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maz View Post
    Searching for your money!

    Back on track...men are just as bad if not worse than ladies at an atm
    How so???

  19. #19
    First Team Maz's Avatar
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    As I said above...forgetting pins, then searching their "wallets" to see if its written down or start having a chat with another fella who comes walking by. Very frustrating
    Ever get the feelin' you have been cheated?

  20. #20
    Seasoned Pro GavinZac's Avatar
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    A woman, accusing men of taking too long rummaging for stuff and chatting excessively? What next, headaches in bed?
    Your Chairperson,
    Gavin
    Membership Advisory Board
    "Ex Bardus , Vicis"

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