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Oddboy, I've leant the basics of Queenstown English... allow me...
"because our chairman dosent care bout our club unlike yours if it was billy woods injured by zico i bet ya he wood have done something bout it he seems to put his oney in the right place.. is john o flynn your best player"
'Mr. Lennox is a fine chairman, commited to Cork City and it's fans. We are envious because our chairman is far less efficient. Our comparative uselessness has nothing then to do with the fact that you're a bigger club. It's purely down to our shambolic chairman. As an example of the difference in standards between our two chairmen please allow me to highlight the recent controversial challenge by one of Cork City's players, Woods, on our own player 'Zico' Hastings. Hastings was badly injured by the despicable villian that is Woods yet our chairman has taken no action, no retalitory violence such as that which the majority of our fans threaten on the internet has been promised. If the situation was reversed Mr. Lennox would already have dipped into his vast wealth and hired Colin Farrell, Vin Diesel and Jean-Claude Van Damme to carry out a gangland style execution of our player. We can't understand why our chairman won't do this!!! On a side note, I would like to enquire as to whether the one you call John O'Flynn is your best player. I like sheep.'
Now oddboy, that's pretty much a perfect translation from Queenstown English to The Queens English (slk's speechwriter - damn I'm gonna get fired for that one) and I hope it will be of some use to you!
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