Birth Control

After having their 11th child, an Offaly couple decided that was
enough, as they could not afford a larger bed. So the husband went to his vet and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.

The vet told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive. A less costly alternative, said the vet, was to go home, get a firework, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.

The Offaly man said to the vet, "I may not be the smartest man in the world, but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me."

"Trust me," said the vet.

So the man went home, lit a firework and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count:
"1"
"2"
"3"
"4"
"5"
At which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs, and resumed counting on his other hand.

This procedure also works in Cavan, Kilkenny ,Kerry, Kildare &
Clondalkin.