"Cool" bands that actually suck

[Dublin12]

Robbie Williams

Read the 3rd paragraph from Lionel's opener again,I agree with everything else you put though.

[Roo69]

Okay kids I'm feeling bitchy. What "Cool" bands do you think are or were just awful. You know the ones I mean. The type of thing Tom Dunne plays because Q magazine tells him he should ..nay must Like. The types students with more money than sense pay 150 quid to watch on a big screen in a godforesaken field in Kildare while waving their event sponsor t-shirt over their head and ignoring the fact they didn't bring sunblock.

Or ....Maybe it's a particular record that's gained iconoclastic status (rumour has it that both Fleetwood Macs Rumours and Van Morrisons Astral Weeks suck balls )

Leave the pop stuff, the talent show contestants, the boybands, the R'n'B types and the Robbies down the drain with some nice caustic soda where they belong.

I'll get the ball rolling shall I? .....

The Bravery Jeeeeeeeesus wept!!! They apparently "evoke the new wave cool of The Cure, New Order and latter day Television".
My hole they do!!! Looking like something out of a 1986 wella advert and sounding like they're tearing the hole out of Duran Durans 'Planet Earth' more like. Evoking nothing but a desire in me to slap them a headbut.

Oasis I never got Oasis. Three good songs in twelve years (and probably not the three that came into your head) does not a good band make. Bland banal pub rock with lyrics that'd make a cheeky girl blush. Oh and a talentless cnut for a lead singer who's apparently charismatic because he puts his hands behind his back and leans into the microphone.

U2 I never got U2 either. Very orrdinary, unremarkable songs ...normally semi-lifted from a decent song by someone else. I heard a scouser opine recently that as far as he's concerned they're "still a 3rd division Bunnymen". I'd go with that.

Snow Patrol I just find yer mans middle class Belfast accent a bit of a low register Brian Kennedy after a verse and a half. (though I commend him for the fact you can tell where he's from in his singing voice ...kudos for that only). Beyond that there must be a picture of these guys next to the word 'Twee' in the dictionary. ...and referring to the love interest in yer songs as 'my dear' (or maybe it's a deer )? It's unmanly I tells ya.

R.E.M. see U2 -but substituting the word 'Bunnymen' for 'Go-Betweens'

It's all about personal choice and tastes in music....... Saying U2 suck or are not a good band is daft IMO

[Dublin12]

It's all about personal choice and tastes in music....... Saying U2 suck or are not a good band is daft IMO

Please.please,please get up off yer knees,I can see a 6 pager coming out of this

[superfrank]

Careful now -Robbie isn't "cool". i.e. you're unlikely to see a guy down the student union wearing a Robbie T-shirt unless...

a) he's making a failed stab at irony
b) it's in a seminary
c) it's in the garda training college

I thought cool meant the media try to make everyone think he's cool.

[Roo69]

Please.please,please get up off yer knees,I can see a 6 pager coming out of this

I like them, always have. Just don't see how a band that has produced tracks such as with or without you, october, lemon, one, pride, new years day, sunday bloody sunday, i will follow etc.... can be considered to "suck" " yeah a lot of people don't like Bono personally but they are top class tunes

[Schumi]

Are The Darkness 'cool'? If so I nominate them.

[Lionel Ritchie]

I thought cool meant the media try to make everyone think he's cool.

In fairness you're correct and the so called "alternative" media have a substantial case to answer in relation to their critical re-evaluation of his total output in a more favourable light and general revisionism towards his career but NO NO NO lets not let this decend in to an RW thread. Sure he's nothing but a song robbing shaved ape of a cnut!!!

Keep 'em cool ...and be cruel!!!

[noby]

I like them, always have. Just don't see how a band that has produced tracks such as with or without you, october, lemon, one, pride, new years day, sunday bloody sunday, i will follow etc.... can be considered to "suck" " yeah a lot of people don't like Bono personally but they are top class tunes

They're (the songs) also all more than 15 years old.
They've sucked with the last decade.

[Lionel Ritchie]

I like them, always have. Just don't see how a band that has produced tracks such as ...

with or without you

jesus I hate that fcuking song

october

like the scouser said -3rd division Bunnymen

lemon

...to be fair -it's in complete compliance with all applicable trade and product descriptions acts

one

good name alright ...Metallica had a song of the same name out three years previous -funny how that seems to happen a lot with U2.

pride

not bad actually -though as a man in a great movie once said "even a stopped clock tells the right time twice a day"

new years day

...that'll be the second telling of the time then.

sunday bloody sunday

nyih ...interesting drum-fill but it's essentially Hurricane or All Along the Watchtower slowed down or sped up a bit thereafter.

i will follow etc....

3rd division Bunnymen B-SIDE

[ken foree]

They're (the songs) also all more than 15 years old.
They've sucked with the last decade.

i largely agree with that though a healthy chunk of zooropa was good (title track, lemon, stay, and dirty day the best), the batman song was v. good, electrical storm in a similar vein isn't bad. the pavarotti song miss sarajevo from Passengers is amazing, and that album is a fairly experimental idea for such a corporate group (fake soundtracks to fake albums), the re-imagining of the mission impossible theme you could include here.. a couple of songs from pop (gone and perhaps mofo), and a couple from elevation might further test your statement. but there is... so much crap from them on those albums as well.

[Hither green]

Most have them have already been said.

Oasis - never got that or why they made it so big.

The Darkness - surely they’re a novelty act, they were never meant to be cool.

Scissor Sisters - actually I don’t know much of their music but the whole kitsch is cool thing makes them seem a novelty act too. To me it’s just naff.

Take That - they weren’t cool the first time round. Why are we being told that they’re cool now that they've ran out of money and are making a comeback?

And lastly the controversial one, the Beatles. Not that I’m saying they were rubbish or anything, in fact I’ve very little opinion on their music but what I hate are the w@nkers like Chris Evans and Oasis going on and on about them. And the fact that half of all 16 year olds would probably call them the greatest band ever just because of Oasis and Chris Evans. They’ve probably never even listened to them. It’s a load of old bo11ox.

[Roo69]

3rd division Bunnymen B-SIDE

Not a chance

[ken foree]

half of all 16 year olds would probably call them the greatest band ever just because of Oasis and Chris Evans. They’ve probably never even listened to them. It’s a load of old bo11ox.

i was a bit like that. i 'knew they were brilliant' but didn't know why. then i grew up. then i listened to them.

[Schumi]

Scissor Sisters - actually I don’t know much of their music but the whole kitsch is cool thing makes them seem a novelty act too. To me it’s just naff.

God yeah, I'd forgotten them. Absolutely terrible!

[wws]

U2 are fcking sh.t

and this has nothing to do with different people having different musical taste
just trust me on this they are ars.e cack

outside of their mega stadium multi media boll.ocks i just couldnt imagine anyone listening to their music on its own merits


its contrived pseudo political aural horse manure

[klein4]

the smiths
echo and the bunnymen
the happy mondays
blur
the gorillaz
the doors
the sex pistols
the libertines
arcade fire
nirvana
metallica

[ken foree]

U2 are fcking sh.t

and this has nothing to do with different people having different musical taste
just trust me on this they are ars.e cack

outside of their mega stadium multi media boll.ocks i just couldnt imagine anyone listening to their music on its own merits


its contrived pseudo political aural horse manure

ever seen them live? i've seen 'em about five times, very different than the recorded output. and i mean the actual songs, not the tomfoolery that goes on around them

[hamish]

Never really got Guns N Roses, probably more to do with Axl than anything, cause I listen to Velvet Revolver a lot.
Apparently The Darkness are reviving the theatrics in rock. Are they bo11ox, they're a bad Queen tribute act that got lucky
Could someone please shoot Fred Durst?

Every time that Sweet Child o' mine comes on VH1 Classic I lose the will to live. I can't stand Rose's whine but I must admit I do like the Terminator song..........a bit.

The Prodigy, Pete Doherty, Durst, The Streets, Ash, Eminem, Darkness etc etc bore the hole off me but, being an old f@rt, what would I know.

The likes of Maroon 5, Athlete, Embrace, Ash, make me want to kill.

That Futureheads song that starts with the silly lyrics involving clues drives me mental along with the riff lifted off The Knack's "My Sharona" - another sh!te band BTW

Must say I have a soft spot for Cradle of Filth It's not 'cos they're any good or anything........I just find them, particularly the lead "vocalist" , incredibly rediculous and funny.

[ken foree]

The Prodigy, Pete Doherty, Durst, The Streets, Ash, Eminem, Darkness etc etc bore the hole off me but, being an old f@rt, what would I know.

this is the whole point. the reason i generally refuse to slate these young bands is because i was young once (hah!), and loved primal scream, oasis, verve, charlatans, blur, fannies, underworld et al. but if you listen to older music, you often find similar things got done before much much better. it is now much more fun for me to listen to some droney folk or psych-noise freakout guitar (blue cheer anyone?) than listen to a verse-chorus-verse-chorus-guitar solo-chorus-outro thing where you can basically tell what's gonna happen next

[strangeirish]

Boomtown Rats.....cool at the time, but some daft music, with one or two exceptions.