Best way to get rid of ugly birds?

[The Stars]

Give us something different to talk about for a change.
Heard this one the other day.
I was sitting down in the pub when this ugly red head came up to me and started chating to me.Before it got to far I decide it was time to get rid of her.She was wearing glasses so this is what i said.
Me-God you look really intellegent,do you read much?
Her-Ya I read loads,I have all my life.
Me-Have you read(RED) Pubes?
Girl gets up and leaves in tears....

This is not Meant to offend any red heads and no red heads were harmed in the making of this conversation.

Anyone else have any good stories?

[dahamsta]

That was a good story?

[The Stars]

Why the question mark ????????

[deecay]

Pathetic The Stars. Pathetic
I will give you a 6/10 for it
5 of those are because you a Rovers supporter like myself.

[The Stars]

well 1 isnt bad so.Come on deecay you stud,lets hear something from you

[strangeirish]

"I'm drunk and your ugly, but I'll be sober in the morning and you'll be still ugly. Now f**k off."

Works all the time for me!!!!

[Cosmo]

Give us something different to talk about for a change.
Heard this one the other day.
I was sitting down in the pub when this ugly red head came up to me and started chating to me.Before it got to far I decide it was time to get rid of her.She was wearing glasses so this is what i said.
Me-God you look really intellegent,do you read much?
Her-Ya I read loads,I have all my life.
Me-Have you read(RED) Pubes?
Girl gets up and leaves in tears....

This is not Meant to offend any red heads and no red heads were harmed in the making of this conversation.

Anyone else have any good stories?

Thats a good one alright - though one question - why didnt he just shag her for the laugh

[noby]

Best way to get rid of anyone?

Just tell one of your good stories. Clear any room.

[drinkfeckarse]

"You're the one who gave my friends crabs aren't ya?" normally works.

[paul_oshea]

lads i doubt ye boys have the opporunity or the chance to knock back the chicks, and if ye did there is no way ye would, as like the fat ones ye dont know where and when its coming from next!

like the churchill quote. the one i use, which doesnt work btw, as i have found out a couple of times is, i have a girlfriend. dont use it as they will keep chatting to ye then, whether or not they want to ride ye.

[thejollyrodger]

red heads are minging alright but i have never been aproached by one thank god.

[dahamsta]

lads i doubt ye boys have the opporunity or the chance to knock back the chicks

I was thinking the same thing meself.

[Aberdonian Stu]

Have to disagree I have a lot of time for red headed women.

[superfrank]

Me too. In fact my girlfriend is a red head. At least I know she's another Celt.

[noby]

red heads are minging alright but i have never been aproached by one thank god.

Thank God indeed.
Obviously you radiate such charm and animal magnatism that you simultaneously attract "fit" "birds", and repel "ugly" "birds".
Such powers can be dangerous in the wrong hands.
*swoon*

[finlma]

red heads are minging alright but i have never been aproached by one thank god.

Probably never even been approached by a gril

[ccfcgirl]

"I'm drunk and your ugly, but I'll be sober in the morning and you'll be still ugly. Now f**k off."

Works all the time for me!!!!

This is the best one so far

[paul_oshea]

ya thats the churchill quote he said it to lady(whats her name?), he also said in repsonse to lady ( cant remember her name )
lady(whatever her name is ): if you were my husband id poison your drink!
churchill: if you were my wife id drink it!!

[thejollyrodger]

Probably never even been approached by a gril

Lets see your misses , she is probably a red head minger

Thank God indeed.
Obviously you radiate such charm and animal magnatism that you simultaneously attract "fit" "birds", and repel "ugly" "birds".
Such powers can be dangerous in the wrong hands.
*swoon*

You sound like a minging red head

[Peadar]

Probably never even been approached by a gril

Not sure he'd ever want to be!