QuoteA young boy asked his mother is it wrong to have a dick,
his mother said no it isnt and why do you ask.
He said "Dad is in the toilet trying to pull his off!!"
There's a fine gale around the southside of Cork City.
Must be Deirdre Clune.
I'd give her 1.
People were banging away, putting it in her box all day yesterday so i'd say she could be up the poll.
Sorry
City definetly have the best bands playing at half-time.
O'Bama - "Eerah yeah, I'd say we can alright!"
G.O'Mahoney Trapattoni'll sort ém out!!
A young boy asked his mother is it wrong to have a dick,
his mother said no it isnt and why do you ask.
He said "Dad is in the toilet trying to pull his off!!"
Buddhist monk walks into a Pizzeria. The waiter comes up and says 'Evening sir, what would you like?' The monk replies, 'make me one with everything.'
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If you don't get it, then think about it
Life without Rovers, it makes no sense...it's a heartache...nothing but a fools game. S.R.F.C.
Paddy complains to his friend that sex with his wife has become boring.
"Use your imagination, why not try playing doctor for an hour, thats what I do" says Seamus.
Paddy says "Jaysus a whole hour!, how do you make it last that long?!"
"Its easy" replies Seamus. "I just keep her in the waiting room for 56 minutes!"
I had a car accident this morning - went straight into the back
of someone.
Bloke got out of his car, he was a dwarf.
He came over and he said "I'm not happy"
So I said "Well, which one are you?"
TO TELL THE TRUTH IS REVOLUTIONARY
The ONLY foot.ie user with a type of logic named after them!
All of this has happened before. All of it will happen again.
THE NUN AND THE HIPPIE
A hippie gets on a bus and spies a pretty young nun. He sits down next to her, and asks her: "Can we have sex?"
"No," she replies, "I'm married to God." She stands up, and gets off at the next stop.
The bus driver, who overheard, turns to the hippie and says: "I can tell you how to get to have sex with her!"
"Yeah?" says the hippie.
"Yeah!" say the bus driver.
"She goes to the cemetery every Tuesday night at midnight to pray, so all you have to do is dress up in a robe with a hood, put some of that luminous powder stuff in your beard, and pop up in the cemetery claiming to be God."
The hippie decides to give it a try, and arrives in the cemetery dressed as suggested on the next Tuesday night.
"I am God," he declares to the nun, keeping the hood low about his face.
"Have sex with me."
The nun agrees without question, but begs him to restrict himself to anal sex, as she is desperate not to lose her virginity.
'God' agrees, and promptly has his wicked way with her.
As he finishes, he jumps up and throws back his hood with a flourish.
"Ha-ha," he cries. "I'm the hippie!"
"Ha-ha," cries the nun. "I'm the bus driver"
Anto from Limerick always wanted to look cool. His friend told him that
he needed a good designer pair of trainers to go with his shellsuit.
Anto saved up all his pay slips and all the money he got back from
returning his empty bottles and finally managed to get himself a pair
of brilliant white trainers to go with his shell suit.
Proudly, he strutted down the street calling out to all the passers by
"See me new trainaz dem? Cool, wha?"
One fine upstanding gentleman pointed out that they were indeed a fine
pair of trainers but was young Anto aware that he had a lace undone?
Anto scornfully retorted that it was part of being cool to have a
trailing lace and that on the bottom of the trainer there were instructions for the wearer to only have one lace tied.
When asked for proof of this instruction, Anto took off his trainer and held it upside down for the disbeliever to read.
"See der! It sez............................................... .................
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"TAIWAN"
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I have probibly the funniest joke ever but im not sure if i should post it , it doesnt contain bad language but still just isnt right , ive prob built it up too much now ..
Can you PM it to me.Originally Posted by anto1208
I have probibly the funniest joke ever but im not sure if i should post it , it doesnt contain bad language but still just isnt right , ive prob built it up too much now ..
TO TELL THE TRUTH IS REVOLUTIONARY
The ONLY foot.ie user with a type of logic named after them!
All of this has happened before. All of it will happen again.
Maybe you should set up a thread entitled "Jokes - off-colour section"I have probibly the funniest joke ever but im not sure if i should post it , it doesnt contain bad language but still just isnt right , ive prob built it up too much now ..
EDIT: Actually, BohsPartisan has the right idea - pm it to me too
That question was less stupid, though you asked it in a profoundly stupid way.
Help me, Arthur Murphy, you're my only hope!
I'm not easily shocked.......PM me also please.
And me........
Someone send it to me as well please. Or just post it...
Last edited by DmanDmythDledge; 30/05/2007 at 1:34 PM.
So wasv Anto's joke it funny then ???
it was crap probably, if not send it to me via pm also. thanks.
I'm a bloke,I'm an ocker
And I really love your knockers,I'm a labourer by day,
I **** up all me pay,Watching footy on TV,
Just feed me more VB,Just pour my beer,And get my smokes, And go away
forward it on to me too lads please!
Me too anto please.
Not that i think we should have a 'jokes in bad taste thread'.
City definetly have the best bands playing at half-time.
O'Bama - "Eerah yeah, I'd say we can alright!"
G.O'Mahoney Trapattoni'll sort ém out!!
Anto PM me please. Or just post it FF
Go on... post it... or just PM me or whatever
Last edited by Stevo Da Gull; 30/05/2007 at 4:06 PM.
Anto, me too please but boy have you built this up
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