QuoteOriginally Posted by Anto McC
Why are the wrong ones funnier?
Whats Pavorotti's wife getting for Xmas?
A smaller turkey
Whats the difference between Robert Murat and a child murderer?
About 200 yards.
The Model Club
Tell all the Bohs you know
that we've gone and won two-in-a-row
and it's not gonna be three
and it's not gonna be four
it's more likely to be 5-1.
I just got a text from Plácido Domingo and José Carreras asking for a lend of a tenner. What's that about?
What's worse than Michael Jackson babysitting your children?
The McCanns taking them on holiday.
This i thought was very funny
Last edited by anto1208; 21/08/2008 at 10:24 AM.
Pavarotti dies and gets to the gates of Heaven. St Peter leads him up to God and says "here's the Tenor I owed you"
Is there any Pavarotti jokes without the tenner pun?
I've one at the moment for anyone that wants to be apalled.
City definetly have the best bands playing at half-time.
O'Bama - "Eerah yeah, I'd say we can alright!"
G.O'Mahoney Trapattoni'll sort ém out!!
pm me
I'm a bloke,I'm an ocker
And I really love your knockers,I'm a labourer by day,
I **** up all me pay,Watching footy on TV,
Just feed me more VB,Just pour my beer,And get my smokes, And go away
Whats pavarotti's wife getting for christmass ?
A smaller Turkey
i dont think any of the pavarotti jokes are any good most are just the same old jokes with his name instead of the last guy .
A couple go for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and order the "Chicken Surprise."
The waiter brings the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot.
Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of the pot rises slightly
and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down.
"Good grief, did you see that?"
she asks her husband. He hasn't, so she asks him to look in the
pot. He reaches for it and again the lid rises, and he sees two little
eyes looking around before it slams down.
Rather perturbed, he calls the waiter over, explains what is
happening, and demands an explanation.
"Please sir," says the waiter, "what you order?"
The husband replies, "Chicken Surprise."
"Ah! So solly," says the waiter,
"I bring you
Peeking Duck!"
An Italian, a Scotsman, and a Chinese fellow were hired at a construction site. The foreman pointed out a huge pile of sand and told the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping." To the Scotsman he said, "You're in charge of shoveling." And to the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of supplies."
He then said, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that there pile."
The foreman went away for a of couple hours, and, when he returned, the pile of sand was untouched. He asked the Italian, "Why didn't you sweep any of it?" The Italian replied, "I no hava no broom. You said to the Chinese fella that he a wasa in a charge of supplies, but he hasa disappeared and I no coulda finda him nowhere." Then the foreman turned to the Scotsman and said, "And you, I thought I told you to shovel this pile."
The Scotsman replied, "Aye, ye did lad, boot ah couldnay get meself a shoovel! Ye left th' Chinese gadgie in chairge of supplies, boot ah couldnay fin' him either." The foreman was really angry by now and stormed off toward the pile of sand to look for the Chinese guy.
Just then, the Chinese guy jumped out from behind the pile of sand and yelled...
"SUPPLIES!!"
.
Jesus, i spit me tea all over the screen....fuppin hilarious!!
renault have designed a new version of people carrier so large and spacious you would even hear a person scream in the back, they have called it ..................
the renault mccann
ill get my coat
Got this text last night and I thought it was great tbh
Renault have just introduced their new family car to the world. You put your kids in the back they disappear! It's called the Renault Mccann
Who Cares?!
Whats black and annoyed ?
Bernard Mannings reincarnation
A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men"... So he stabbed her and nicked her purse.
Irish prostitute in the police station.
Desk officer says " When did you realise you were raped?"
She says " When the f*****g cheque bounced!"
Last edited by anto1208; 13/09/2007 at 1:12 PM.
Osama Bin Laden has released a video supposedly proving that he is still alive. In he states that Cork were sh!t on Sunday. The Irish government have refused to comfirm the authenticity of it stating that the video could have been recorded any time in the last 25 years!
Portuguese police involved in the Madeline McCann investigation have been called to Ireland to aid Gardai in their search for the Cork goalkeeper
Women are like parking spaces, normally all the good ones are gone. So, occasionally, when no one's looking, you stick it in a disabled one.
What do northsiders use for protection during sex?
A bus stop
have to hear this...go on send us a PM...cheers
whats the difference between gary glitter and the Mccanns....
Gary Glitter comes home from holidays with more kids than when he left with.
-------------------------------------------------------
Whats blue and fu cks old grannies........ pneumonia
Jose Mourinho has landed on his feet, well not quite with a position as a chief engineer for NASA on the International Space Station. Speaking at a press conference in Houston, the portuguese pronounced
"Please do not call me arrogant but i am a spatial one."
City definetly have the best bands playing at half-time.
O'Bama - "Eerah yeah, I'd say we can alright!"
G.O'Mahoney Trapattoni'll sort ém out!!
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