This bloke is working on the buses and collecting tickets. He rings the
bell
for the driver to set off when there's a woman half getting on the bus. The
driver sets off, the woman falls from the bus and is killed. At the trial the
bloke is sent down for murder and seeing as it's Texas he's sent to the
electric chair.
On the day of his execution he's sat in the chair and the executioner grants
him a final wish. "Well" says the man, "is that your packed lunch over
there?"
"Yes" answers the executioner. "Can I have that banana?" The executioner
gives
the man his banana and waits till he's eaten it. When the man's finished,
the
executioner flips the switch sending hundreds of thousands of volts
through
the man. When the smoke clears the man is still alive. The executioner
can't
believe it. "Can I go?" the man asks. "I suppose so" says the executioner,
"that's never happened before." The man leaves and eventually gets his
job
back on the buses selling tickets. Again he rings the bell for the driver to
go when people are still getting on. A man falls under the wheels and is
killed. The bloke is sent down for murder again and sent to the electric
chair.
The executioner is determined to do it right this time so rigs the chair up to
the electric supply for the whole of Texas. The bloke is again sat in the
chair. "What is your final wish ?" asks the executioner. "Can I have that
banana in your packed lunch ?" says the condemned man. The
executioner sighs
and reluctantly gives up his banana. The bloke eats the banana all up and
the
executioner flips the switch. Millions of volts course through the chair
blacking out Texas. When the smoke clears the man is still sat there
smiling
in the chair. The executioner can't believe it and lets the man go. Well,
would you believe, the bloke gets his job back on the buses. Once again
he
rings the bell whilst passengers are still getting on, this time killing three
of them. He is sent to the electric chair again. The executioner rigs up all
the worlds electricity to the chair, determined to get his man this time. The
man sits down in the chair smiling. "What's your final wish?" asks the
executioner. "Well" says the man, "Can I have that banana out of your
packed
lunch." The executioner hands over his banana and the man eats it all,
skin
included. The executioner then pulls the handle and a zillion million trillion
volts go through the chair. When the smoke rises the man is still sat there
alive without even a burn mark. "I give up" says the executioner, "I don't
understand how you can still be alive after all that?" He stroked his chin.
"It's something to do with that banana isn't it?" he asked.
"Nahh," said the bloke, "I'm just a really bad conductor."
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