QuoteUlster accent, thats a very broad spectrum..Originally Posted by John83
I suppose my superb reply won't work either...need to speak in a Leinster accent..
That joke only works with an Ulster accent.
Ulster accent, thats a very broad spectrum..
I suppose my superb reply won't work either...need to speak in a Leinster accent..
I'd speak broadly of Ulster touchiness, but that might not go down too well.
Did you want to tell him to 'fock off'?
Little boy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores.
"Not yet," said the little boy.
His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores.
Well, he's a little ****ed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
"How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks.
"Well," his mother says, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I saw you kick the cow so for a week you aren't getting any milk."
Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.
The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, "You gonna tell him or should I?"
The New York chief of police says he'll never forget 9/11.
I would hope not seeing as it's his phone number.
My Goal Is To Deny Yours...
September 11th seems like just yesterday to me.
Never have unprotected phone sex. You could end up with hearing aids.
Paddy Doherty went today to donate his Big Brother winnings to his favourite charity, only to be told they don't accept travellers cheques.
I had to dump my cross-eyed girlfriend. She was seeing someone else.
Now the way is open to nail your crush.
I mean...
Nail her? Time for a lesson in etiquette
I was in my local Indian restaurant when I heard about REM splitting up. I was so upset I fainted.
That's me in the korma......
How to Impress a Woman
Compliment her,
cuddle her,
kiss her,
caress her,
love her,
stroke her,
tease her,
comfort her,
protect her,
hug her,
hold her,
spend money on her,
wine & dine her,
buy things for her,
listen to her,
care for her,
stand by her,
support her,
go to the ends of the earth for her....
How to Impress a Man
Show up naked.
Bring beer.
All you zombies tweet tweet tweet.
Doughnuts are my own particular vice.
Guy goes into his doctor and says "Doctor you've got to help me,I spend all my time online and even worse I'm addicted to twitter"
Doctor says "I'm sorry I don't follow you".
A Dublin lad takes his girlfriend home for the first time. He says, "This is Amanda." His dad jumps up. "It's a ****ing wha?"
Last edited by strangeirish; 27/09/2011 at 6:25 PM.
Did you ever notice that in every painting of Adam & Eve, they have belly buttons. Think about that...take as long as you want.
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