That was like the guy (or maybe this is an urban myth) who went into Budget Travel
looking to go to the match against the Faroe Islands ... and ended up booking a trip to Faro
Booking a Hotel in Barletta and not Bari for the up coming Italian match and only realising yesterday.
That was like the guy (or maybe this is an urban myth) who went into Budget Travel
looking to go to the match against the Faroe Islands ... and ended up booking a trip to Faro
Larry Be Wyse
www.acsportsimages.com
the migget whore in Prague
enough said!!!
Now weather you think is funny or not a short story from Orlando 94 .
Those days I never had tickets for games and was always doing my best to buy them at each game .
I do remember a group of Liverpool lads ( I could think of another word but i wont ) who were buying and selling tickets for the Italy game anyway I did manage to score two for that game but gave these lads the wide berth .
I saw them again in Orlando I was having trouble getting tickets so I asked one of them . He said this is going to be really expensive but I do have tickets , I just told him to flip off and moved on .
Ten minutes later there was a huge shouting match with one Irish lad and the tout ( ooh sorry Liverpool guy ) who shouted I am not paying that then the cops on mountain bikes rushed in to see what was going on . The Irish lad said I am not paying that for a $ 35 tickets and the cop agreed and said I have 7 tickets going at face value anyone need one . I will take a couple and paid my $70 and winked at the tout .
Funny thing we never saw those lads agian when we got back up to New York for the next game
Larry Be Wyse
www.acsportsimages.com
WC 94, went down to Orlando to meet up with a bunch of lads from home. Got there a bit early so, went for a few pints with the Dutch contingent that were staying at the same hotel on International Drive. After about three hours of trying to keep up with those lads and lassies, I get a call to come to the front desk in the lobby. My friends were waiting for me and as I hadn't seen them in a few years, I started to jog towards them. Unfortunately, my shoe caught the lip of the rug in the lobby and as I stumbled towards them, I managed to maintain my balance(after three attempts) and made it to the desk in one piece. One of the lads says aloud "Jaysus, ye looked like a paraplegic on roller skates coming at us"...The look on the front desks clerk was priceless as he pictured the thought in his head and doing his best not to burst his hole laughing with the rest of us.
Anyway, that was my best away trip...
Did you ever notice that in every painting of Adam & Eve, they have belly buttons. Think about that...take as long as you want.
That reminds of the poor lad in Cyprus in Aya Napa who everybody copped looked a bit like Rooney. Fair play to the lad he was giving it socks plenty of signing from him so everybody could see him. The Whole crowd outside the pub were giving it socks.
In Trap we trust
My favourite has to be paying two local gypo musicians from Rimini one with an accordion and the other with a trumpet to go up to our mates room while he was having a crafty kip.. I swear he jumped about 8 feet in the air when the trumpet went off in his ear.. and the comment from the geezer who ran the place you cannot bring them in here people are sleeping... not anymore their not, priceless!!! On the same trip getting a drunken phone call at 4 in the morning from one of the lads who was lost byt was in fact around the corner from our hostel.. Happy Days!
Anybody see Borat in the Piazza before the match???
LESS OF THE BULL NOW!
Swimming pool in Orland in 94. I'm wearing my Ireland jersey. Teenage redneck kid straight out of Deliverance, 17 or 18 and on holidays, comes up to me.
Kid: "Hey, Did I see you playing on TV last night?"
Me: "No, this is a replica shirt, all fans wear them"
Then a bunch of Dutch fans walk past, wearing orange.
Kid: "So, who are those guys in orange?"
Me: "They're Dutch"
Kid: "Huh?"
Me: "You know, from Holland"
Kid: "Huh?"
Me: "It's a country"
Kid: "Oh yeah, I know, it's that film, right?"
Me: "Which one?"
Kid: "Heidi"
Needless to say we nearly wet ourselves.
26 years later and the Cops singing in Bordeaux, go home for the french Police.
Nice to know the fans haven't changed that much in 25+ years.
I've a good few, but one that again you had to be there and no the person, was just so funny was in Poland. One of the lads who i've never seen getting sick before, we had KFC before we got the trip back to poznan from Gdansk. He was loving the KFC, got on the train for the rest of the journey he was hot sweat to cold sweats giving him water constantly, holding out. He was really in a very bad way. 4 hours later managed to keep it going without getting sick but still hadn't said a word, but we'd run out of water, arrived in Poznan, got in the taxi and it was splitting no air-con. He was rolling the window up and down constantly, and was like I'm not good, this isnt good(same lad dosen't show emotions at all and rarely would look for help of any type ye know the kind) sticking his head out the window, taxi driver thought he was off his head on something. Like he was freezing cold at this stage but sweat dripping down him and we were panicking a bit. After about 20 mins in the taxi we get to the gaffe. Grand. Just as we are entering the place, the footpath is narrow loads of green grass, right on the steps in front of everyone he pukes his ring. All this weird white liquid coming out, nearly getting sick thinking of it now. It was so funny everyone around was pure disgusted, if he'd even just moved a foot he was getting sick on the grass. The sick was still there for a few days after it never seemed to move and no one cleaned it up. Poor lad had kept it going all that way and then baaaaaah. Needless to say he felt much better. It's very funny because the guy was at his weakest lowest ebb and he is very proud. Needless to say if he ever gets cheeky he gets reminded of that.
In Bordeaux we went to this fancy nightclub, a mixed group, bribed the bouncer 50 euro to get in. We didnt have to pay entrance so we ended up saving abotu 30 euro, they were too thick to cop on. All the others waiting 30-40 mins to get in. Must try that again, anyway we started drinking with these cops, one was quite senior and was saying we'll show ye around and all this and how great the irish fans and the relief that the fans brought and took their minds off things. About 2 mins later my mate turns around "one of the cops is ****ing up against the bar". He didn't give a sh1te he wasnt even that drunk. No one said anything to him either, big massive puddle of **** and they all just continued on as normal. All the hot bar staff saw it and didn't say anything either. I couldn't figure it out at all. Strange more than funny really.
I'm a bloke,I'm an ocker
And I really love your knockers,I'm a labourer by day,
I **** up all me pay,Watching footy on TV,
Just feed me more VB,Just pour my beer,And get my smokes, And go away
Posh friend of mine and his lady wife were at Italia 90 and staying in a nice hotel in Palermo. They got talking to a couple of Cork lads and after the usual exchange of pleasantries and graphic details of her room with balcony and mini bar etc, she asks one of the Cork lads where they are staying. He nods in the direction of the car park and with a strong Cork accent proudly states "Hotel Peugeot".
Forget about the performance or entertainment. It's only the result that matters.
I'm a bloke,I'm an ocker
And I really love your knockers,I'm a labourer by day,
I **** up all me pay,Watching footy on TV,
Just feed me more VB,Just pour my beer,And get my smokes, And go away
Bookmarks