Here are a few Limericks plus a joke in there somewhere.
There once was a girl from Whick
Who said to her Mum "What's a dick?"
She said "My dear Annie,
It goes up your fanny
And jumps up and down till it's sick".
A horny young lady named Lil
phucked a dynamite stick for a thrill
They found her vagina
in north Carolina
and bits of her tits in Brazil
There was a young man from Belgrade
Who kept a dead whore in a cave
He said "I admit
I'm a bit of a sh!t
But think of the money I save!"
A lady encountered two vicars
Who attempted to take off her knickers.
When she remonstrated
They replied, quite elated,
"Blame it all on spirituous liquors!"
There once was a man from Brighton
Who said to his girl, "You're a tight one"
She said, "Pardon my soul,
But you're in the wrong hole.
There's plenty of room in the right one."
How do you circumcise a whale?
With four skin divers
An bard named Tony McNamitar
Had a tool of enormous diameter,
But it was not the size
that brought tears to their eyes,
'Twas the rhythm and Iambic Pentameter.
There once was a jolly old preist
who was hornier than a wild beast
the sins of his mind
into some lads behind
were often from his soul released
There once was a fellow named Jock
with a most insatiable kock
his wife, so I hear
out of cruelty or fear
keeps it under a chain and a lock
Want to know 'bout this site's creator?
He is a world-class masturbater
He once won the Gold
for his famous choke hold
And hopes there is more to come later
I heard of a red-blooded male
Whose puckup techinque's yet to fail
He fills chicks with booze
and waits till they snooze
then serves 'em his special 'kock-tail'!
There was a young lady named Kite
Whose speed was much faster than light.
She left home one day
In a relative way
And returned on the previous night.
Said an ape as he swung by his tail,
To his offspring both female and male,
"From your offspring, my dears,
In a couple of years,
May evolve a professor at Yale."
An eager young vicar from Louth
Raged against sins such as sloth
He preached masturbation
To the whole congregation
and was washed down the aisle in the froth.