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dunno why I'm startin this thread - if its been done already let me know:
Well, when you’re sitting back
In your rose pink cadillac
Making bets on kentucky derby day
I’ll be in my basement room
With a needle and a spoon
And another girl to take my pain away
Dead Flowers - rolling stones
Shady Lane - Pavement :cool:
"Blind date with the chancer
We had oysters and dry lancers
when the check arrived,
we went dutch, dutch, dutch, dutch
A redder shade of neck on a whiter shade of trash
And this emery board is giving me a rash
I’m flat out
You’re so beautiful to look at when you cry
Freeze, don’t move
You’ve been chosen as an extra in the movie adaptation
Of the sequel to your life"
Orgasm Addict - The Buzzcocks
well you tried it just for once found it all right for kicks.
but now you found out that it's a habit that sticks.
and you're an orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
sneaking in the back door with dirty magazines.
now your mother wants to know what all those stains on your jeans.
and you're an orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
uh huh, uh huh, uhhhhh, uhhhhh [x3]
you get in a heat, you get in a sulk.
but you still keep a beating your meat to pulp.
and you're an orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
you're a kid cassanova.
you're a no-josep it's a labour of love ****ing yourself to death.
orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
uh huh, uhhhhh [x10] you're makin' out with school kids, winos and heads of state.
you even made it with the lady, who puts the little plastic bobins on the christmas cakes.
butchers' assistants and bellhops, you've had them all here and there.
children of god and their joy-strings, international women with no body hair.
oooh, so where they're askin' in an alley and your voice ain't steady.
if your sex mechanic's rough you're more than ready.
you're an orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
johnny want ****ie always and all ways.
he's got the energy, he will remain.
he's an orgasm addict.
he's an orgasm addict.
he's always at it.
he's always at it.
and he's an orgasm addict.
he's an orgasm addict.
anyone can just copy and paste lyrics.
have sort of a competition
There's no competition. This is the best song ever
The Magnetic Fields - Absolutely Cuckoo
Don't fall in love with me yet
We only recently met
True I'm in love with you but
you might decide I'm a nut
Give me a week or two to
go absolutley cuckoo
then, when you see your error,
then, you can flee in terror
like everybody else does
I only tell you this cause
I'm easy to get rid of
but not if you fall in love
Know now that I'm on the make
and if you make a mistake
my heart will certainly break
I'll have to jump in a lake
and all my friends will blame you
There's no telling what they'll do
It's only fair to tell you
I'm absolutely cuckoo
"well I went from the Andes to the Indies in my undies"
'Eno Collaboration' by Half Man Half Biscuit.
Loads more by the biccies actually. Best lyricists ever.
by smog
Dress sexy at my funeral my good wife
Dress sexy at my funeral my good wife
For the first time in your life
Wear your blouse undone to hear
And your skirt split up to here
Oh Dress sexy at my funeral my good wife
For the first time in your life
Oh Dress sexy at my funeral my good wife
Wink at the minister
Blow kisses to my grieving brothers
Dress sexy at my funeral my good wife
And when it comes your turn to speak before the crowd
Tell them about the time we did it
On the beach with fireworks above us
On the railroad tracks with the gravel in your back
In the back room of a crowded bar
And in the graveyard where my body now rests
Oh Dress sexy at my funeral my good wife
Dress sexy at my funeral my good wife
For the first time in your life
Also tell them about how I gave to charity
And tried to love my fellow man as best i could
But most of all don't forget about the time on the beach
With fireworks above us
Oh, Oh, Oooooh ...
just run with this thing baby!Quote:
Originally Posted by $Leon$
One Summer evening drunk to hell
I stood there nearly lifeless
An old man in the corner sang
Where the water lilies grow
And on the jukebox Johnny sang
About a thing called love
And it's how are you kid and what's your name
And how would you bloody know?....
Don't need to say who that is!!,if you don't know you're not worthy :D
Stone Roses - Elizabeth My Dear
Tear me apart and boil my bones
I'll not rest till she's lost her throne
My aim is true my message is clear
It's curtains for you, Elizabeth my dear
Ian Dury - F*ck Off Noddy
Winnie The Pooh is having a w*nk
“And what are you up to?” said Tommy the Tank
Peter the Rabbit is at it as well
And all the young pixies in Dingelydell
Singing: “f*ck off Noddy, you stupid prat”
“F*ck off Noddy in your rotten hat”
Sinbad the Sailor is drunk as a sack
Mary Contrary is flat on her back
Pinky and Perky are having a snog
Little Miss Muffet’s been sick as a dog
Singing: “f*ck off Noddy, you little pr*ck”
“F*ck off Noddy, you get on my wick”
Happy and Dopey are smoking a joint
Sneezy’s flaked out, he can’t see the point
“F*ck this for a lark” said Sweet Jack of Hearts
“Which one of you b*stards has sh*t on my tarts?”
Singing: “f*ck off Noddy you bloodless berk”
“F*ck off Noddy, you’re just a jerk”
F*ck off Noddy, you smelly turd
F*ck off Noddy you’re so absurd
F*ck off Noddy you stupid prat
F*ck off Noddy in your rotten hat
F*ck off Noddy you little wimp
F*ck off Noddy you’re a p*ss brained shrimp
F*ck off Noddy you stupid prat
F*ck off Noddy in your rotten hat
Brian McFadden-
'we'll invite the family round and drink some English tea
then I lift up my finger
and watch football on tv'
Worthy of Shakespeare that....
Agreed class lyrics as are the I Am The Resurrection lyrics in fact the album is full of classicsQuote:
Originally Posted by Macy
Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
"Fast forwards through"? Still listening on tape? I wouldn't fast forward or skip any of that album. I mean even if it wasn't your favourite bit of the album, it's only a minute....Quote:
Originally Posted by Conor74
Stinkin Thinkin - The Happy Mondays
Steady job in a small town
Guaranteed to bring me right down
Guaranteed to take me nowhere
Guaranteed to make me lose my hair
An 80's man to the core :DQuote:
Originally Posted by Conor74
I was twenty one years when I wrote this song
I'm twenty two now, but I won't be for long
People ask when will you grow up to be a man
But all the girls I loved at school
are already pushing prams
I loved you then as I love you still
Tho I put you on a pedestal,
They put you on the pill
I don't feel bad about letting you go
I just feel sad about letting you know
I don't want to change the world
I'm not looking for a new England
I'm just looking for another girl
I don't want to change the world
I'm not looking for a new England
I'm just looking for another girl
I loved the words you wrote to me
But that was bloody yesterday
I can't survive on what you send
Every time you need a friend
I saw two shooting stars last night
I wished on them but they were only satellites
Is it wrong to wish on space hardware
I wish, I wish, I wish you'd care
I don't want to change the world
I'm not looking for a new England
I'm just looking for another girl
Billy Bragg A New England.
Son, I`m 30
I only went with your mother `cause she`s dirty
And I don`t have a decent bone in me
What you get is just what you see yeah
I should so I take it free yeah
And all the bad **** ugly things i feed me
I never help or give to the needy
Come on and see me
Yippee-ippee-ey-ey-ay-yey-yey
I had to crucify some brother today
And I don`t dig what you gotta say
So come on and say it
Come on and tell me twice
I said dad you`re a shabby
You run around and groove like a baggy
You`re only here just out of habit
All that`s mine you might as well have it
You take 10p back and then stab it
Spray it on and tag it
So sack on me
I can`t stand the needy
Get around here if you`re asking you`re feeling
Kinky Afro - Happy Mondays
Jimmy Soul:
If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
'Did ya ever shove a banger up yer @rse at halloween?'
- Podge and Rodge
...well, did ya?
Tom McRae:
"If words could kill I'd spell out your name"
Another Billy Bragg one...
Technically this is an illegal strike
Never cross a picket line
But technically workers have no rights
Never cross a picket line
You must never cross a picket line
More Half Man Half Biscuit
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS A DUKLA PRAGUE AWAY KIT
There was one of the gang who had Scalextric
And because of that ;
He thought he was better than you,
And the day after school,
You'd go around there to play him,
Hoping to compete for some kind of championship,
And it always took about 15 billion hours to set the track up.
And even when you did, the thing never seemed to work.
It was a dodgy transformer, again and again.
It was a dodgy transformer, again and again.
It was a dodgy blue mass, again and again.
A dodgy transformer, cost 3 pounds 10.
So he sent his doting mother
Up the stairs with the stepladders,
To get the Subbuteo
Out of the loft.
It had all the accessories
Required for that big-match atmosphere.
The crowd and the dugout,
And the floodlights, too.
And you'd always get palmed off
With a headless center-forward,
And a goal-kicker with no arms,
And a face like his.
And he'd managed to get hold of
A Dukla-Prague Away Kit,
His uncle owned a sport shop
And he'd kept it to one side.
And after only five minutes
You'd be down to ten men,
And then he sent off your right back
For taking the base from under his left-winger.
Come to half-time, you were losing, four-nil.
Each and every goal, a hotly disputed penalty.
So you smash up the floodlights
And the game was abandoned,
And the dog would bark
And you'd be banned from his house.
And your travelling army
Of synthetic supporters
Would be taken away from you
And thrown in the bin.
And now he's working
In a job with a future.
He hands me my Giro (as in gyroscope, not "hero")
Every two weeks.
And me, I'm on the lookout
For a proper transformer.
Ugh?!
THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE
My Uncle Charlie is a cynical man
And his wife's a touch sceptical, too.
They've got one of those stickers
In the back of their van; it says:
We've seen the prices at the zoo.
Well today I knocked upon their door
And said that I was passing,
And Charlie launched a scathing attack.
When I asked him what I'd done, he said
"You stupid b*st***! We live in a cul-de-sac!"
Went to Dali's party; it was fancy dress.
I just stuck an apple in my face.
I saw a chap who obviously was out to impress,
Reckoned he'd beat Gagarin into space.
He said "Hi there Sals
Like I'm sorry I'm late!
But I was getting done up
As a Mogul Thrash acetate!"
Me, I got bored
So I went home,
Got into bed,
And came to the conclusion...
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Biro
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Biro
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Biro
There is nothing better in life
Than writing on the sole of your slipper with a Biro
On a Saturday Night instead of going to a pub.
DICKIE DAVIES EYESQuote:
Originally Posted by Lionel Ritchie
Mention the Lord of the Rings just once more
And I'll more than likely kill you.
"Moorcock, Moorcock, Michael Moorcock" you fervently moan.
Is this a wok that you shoved down my throat,
Or are you just pleased to see me?
Brian Moore's head looks uncannily like London Planetarium.
Chorus:
And all those people
Who you, romantically,
Like to still believe are alive,
Are dead!
So I'll wipe my snots
On the arm of your chair
As you put another Roger Dean poster
On the wall.
God, I could murder a Cadbury's Flake!
Then I guess you wouldn't let me into heaven.
Or maybe you would cause their adverts promote oral sex!
A Romany bint in a field with her paints,
Suggesting we faint at her beauty,
But she's got "Dickie Davis Eyes!"
Chorus x 2
THE B*ST**D SON OF DEAN FRIEDMAN
Well I heard a lovely rumor,
That Bette Midler had a tumor,
So gleefully I went to tell my friends.
But they said it was a lie,
That she wasn't going to die,
"And by the way, have we got news for you!"
And they told me that the man
That I had always billed as "Dad",
Hadn't met my "Mum" when I was born.
And they reckon that I am,
But I hope to God I'm not,
The b*st**d son of Dean Friedman,
The b*st**d son of Dean Friedman.
And my school-work fell behind
With this bombshell on my mind.
Me art teacher said he understood.
But he could only sympathise
With the sadness in my eyes,
Even though he'd shown me his Magritte!
And in the "Corridors of Fear"
I would shed a lovely tear,
As ridicule flew at me from both sides.
And they mocked me in my mocks,
And embroidered in my socks,
The b*st**d son of Dean Friedman,
The b*st**d son of Dean Friedman.
Supercalifragilistic,Borussia Moenchengladbach
And you can thank your lucky stars that you're not
The b*st**d son of Dean Friedman,
The b*st**d son of Dean Friedman
PABLO PICASSO.... recorded in 1973 by Jonathan Richman & The Modern Lovers also covered by John Cale and most recently by David Bowie who added some lyrics and took some out. This is the original version.
Words and music: jonathan richman
Well some people try to pick up girls
And get called Ass****s
This never happened to pablo picasso
He could walk down your street
And girls could not resist his stare and
So pablo picasso was never called an Ass****
Well the girls would turn the color
Of the avacado when he would drive
Down their street in his el dorado
He could walk down you street
And girls could not resist his stare
Pablo picasso never got called an Ass****
Not like you
Alright
Well he was only 5’3"
But girls could not resist his stare
Pablo picasso never got called an Ass****
Not in new york
Oh well be not schmuck be not abnoxious
Be not bellbottom bummer or Ass****
Remember the story of pablo picasso
He could walk down your street
And girls could not resist his stare
Pablo picasso was never called an ass****
Alright this is it
Some people try to pick up girls
And they get called an ass****
This never happened to pablo picasso
He could walk down your street
And girls could not resist his stare and so
Pablo Picasso was never called.........
Very educational don't you think? :D
I WAS A TEENAGE ARMCHAIR HONVED FAN by Half Man Half Biscuit
Woke up this morning and found myself in bed.
My knowledge of the blues is somewhat nil.
I dreamt about about a love-affair
In far-off Budapest.
The sort of thing that sugars every pill.
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I went dans la cuisine, in a bi-linguistic mood.
And Morphy Richards popped up with the goods.
I was feeling 'Hungary' both this morning and last night,
with an appetite like that you see the woods.
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
Is this the bit where we're supposed to make guitars collide, and
Is this the bit where we release all that raw energy, and
Is this the bit where we go crashing through those barriers,
Like wot they do in music mags?!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair wham bam thank you.
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair wooo oooh ooh.
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
I was a teenage armchair Honved fan!
Reasons To Be Miserable Part 10
Half Man Half Biscuit
(Back In The D.h.s.s.)
A fairly attractive girl walks past a building site,
And from underneath an industrial safety helmet you hear:
(wolf-whistle) Ta Neil (thanking Neil)
And you stand there
Witnessing the whole Neanderthal situation
Wanting to twist your own brain out
As they sit there on their newly build wall
Laughing their hods off.
Chorus:
Reasons to be miserable,
Another good excuse to be dead.
It's one more thing to gripe about
As I while away my time in bed.
And then there's the person who collects all things "Pierrot",
And loves Siamese cats,
And thinks they're sophisticated because they eat Fries' Chocolate Cream,
And who'd do anything to spend the night
With a fellow off the Turkish Delights advert,
Who is full of instant mono-sodium glutamate,
And they always have a portrait of a sad clown on the wall,
And who go to charity shops,
And tend to become slightly orgasmic
At the thought of vampire lust.
"Cringe!"
Chorus x 2
And I don't know anyone who puts peaches on their cornflakes, either!
:D
Because I'm a big girl underneath my scruffy appearance:
'We wake up in the breakdown of the things we never thought we could be' - 'Here Is Gone', Goo Goo Dolls
I only wanted to be 16 and free' - Blind Melon (forget the song title) :o
'I loved you, and I should have said it but tell me just what has it ever meant' - 'Kill', Jimmy Eat World
'Your ass like Jesus' feet, worth kissing' - 'A moment of clarity', Therapy?