burn shearers rented Fiat Punto, before this they stole his allooys, shearer was stranded so he phoned pat devlin, his friend and.....Quote:
Originally Posted by OwlsFan
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burn shearers rented Fiat Punto, before this they stole his allooys, shearer was stranded so he phoned pat devlin, his friend and.....Quote:
Originally Posted by OwlsFan
asked would he have talk to john delaney about giving him the ireland job, pat rang john delaney and said........
i have a bigger dope dan stan willing to take the job ,to witch he replied...Quote:
Originally Posted by ramsfan
the job is his and you can promise him i will give him three years and will back him 100%, delaney happy with his choice sat back to have a cuppa and listen to the radio when the charts came on and at number 1 was "i am the boss, i am the gaffer" by stan and his backing band the........
paul ince self-obsessed underachievers whose biggest hit was getting that clout off trator keane for siding with ian wright against schmeichel in the highbury tunnel.:eek:
which brings us only nicely to the incident where arsene wenger was caught playing with the little...
Christmas Tree air-freshener in Alex Fergusson's car,only for him to be discovered by....Quote:
Originally Posted by placid casual
slap head bobby charlton who regaled wenger with tales of how matt busby was a great mamager and that manchester united was more than just a fat corporate slag desperatley seeking the metaphoric semen of finacial equity.
weneger said he hadnt seen the incident and couldnt possibly comment on the christmas tree or even the christmas tree formation.
out of the corner of his eye he spotted a large hulk of a man approaching and in his hand was .......
Roy Keane's Dis-membered head, which it was plain to see had been haphazardly hacked off his shoulders. the large hulk of a man pulled down the hood which had been obscuring his features to reveal that he was in fact Alfe-Inge Haaland who grinning madly said "......
Now who's the C You Next Tuesday !!
from the dismembered head was the familiar cork squeal of keane and he says" does anyone know if george o'callaghan is for sale,like, as I'm steadily building a noahs ark of 2nd grade irish footballers,like"
wenger had enough iof this tomfoolery and off he skittled off down trafford centre when who does he bump into only stephen ireland and he pushing 3 prams and wearing a noel mooney icon around his neck for male patttern baldness relief. "ello monsiuer irlande" says arsene and to this stephen replies ...
what you talking about fool dont go dissing my barnet, it is real you know.
meanwhile in sunderland stephen hunt was discussing his transfer the most important thing being the availability of blahs, quinn says to him that there is no blahs in sunderland, hunt replies " doya want yer go bouy" quinn replies.....
"Do you like chicken nuggets?"; meanwhile a bunch of Sligo Rovers' fans started....
blaming Bohs for the war on terror. Bohs claimed it wasn't their fault. It was really...Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddyfield
...Sean Connor because he left Sligo with a big......
inflatable Horse that used to belong to Lord Lucan who gave it to...........
lord mountbatton who stored it on his boat. one day while out cruising the irish waterways didnt the inflatable horse catch the breeze and off it flew into the garden of none other than ......
The Vilage Idiot who sold it in the local bar for 6 and tuppence to sean connor who used said horse to engage in various nefarious pastimes resulting in ......................
jason mcguinness plying his trade for the bohs under sean connors carefull tutelage until one day sean worked out the subtle difference between horse and donkey and my how everyone laughed at his equestrian mix up. the laughter subsided when all of a sudden....
A Horde over rovers "Fans" laid waste to the Long Bar in Dalymount earning themselves the Moniker ".......
"the waste disposal experts",a name which was shared by the those guys with all those keys over the road in mountjoy...there was another name for the mountjoy blokes and that was.....
... nothing compared to what Bohs' fans called Roddy when he left Dalymount but in the true spirit of Irish football, Pat Dolan got the Rep of Ireland job because....
...he was the fattest candidate for the job and also had the worst hairstyle. In his first day in the job Pat decided to...Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddyfield
bring in mick wallace as hair consultant,sean connor as tracksuit sylist and give each squad member a copy of "the little prince" in honour of the FAI supremo Mr Delaney. all went well until.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by placid casual
Stephen Ireland phoned to say his pet hamster had an umset tummy and that he couldn't join the squad as he had to look after Hammy the Hamster. Dolan passed the matter over to Givens who....
said in his time "the squad used have to eat hamster cos thats all there was to eat and that they young these days they dont know their born,and anyways I should be the manager not that fat git".
givens was given the sack quite soon after and in his place was appointed.....
Don Givens junior who said in his dad's time "the squad used have to eat hamster cos thats all there was to eat and that the young these days dont know they're born,and anyways my dad should be the manager not that fat git". Pat Dolan was unimpressed by this diatribe and went on Setanta where he announced that...Quote:
Originally Posted by placid casual
the eircom league is a fabalis league and should be marketed more by the FAI.
this comment went down badly,like gillian taylforth on the m25.
delaney gave fatso the sack and replaced him with liam brady who had to be dragged outta an all nighter with dunphy in the horseshoe bar. "i love you liam brady" dunphy shouted before finding Katies Koke on the ground and dissapeared into the bar toliets shouting after him".....
..."Give Roddy Collins the Ireland job" and so the FAI appointed Roddy who went searching to see which players in England have Irish grannies; his first task was to announce the new Irish captain who is....
Jay Tabb,the young Coventry lad has a dislike for Roddy though because.......
roddy stole his pocket money to pay for his expensive taste in dunnes stores briefs and pennys aromatic candles. roddy promised him the sun,the moon and the stars,just as soon as the plastering nixer he was promised come's through. tabb attacked the northside clown with a ........
designer handbag and got very upset when the Guicci strap broke. Roddy beat a hasty retreat to his favourite pub which was called...Quote:
Originally Posted by placid casual
"the rale owel dubballin plasterers gaffe wha".
he had, however, forgotten he was barred for crimes to dry-lining and so off he went to his brothers place for 6 cans of dutch gold and a 10 spot of diesel hash. he had a great oul time untill....
the phone rang. It was Paul Dempsey from Setanta wondering where he was as he was supposed to have been in the studio an hour ago. He immediately hopped in to a taxi only to find....
out the taxi driver,like all taxi drivers in dublin apparently,was a Rovers fan who promptly gave roddy a right good hiding resulting in a trip to the Mater for roddy.who should he meet in A & E only.......
Martin "The Viper" Foley who was in having a few bullets removed from his chest and one from between his teeth. "Howya Martin" Roddy said "Jaysus you after been shot again !?"
foley just grunted and looked menacingly at Roddy. "ffs Martin how many is that now 17 , 18 times you've been shot, maybe your doing something wrong if all these geezers want you dead, why don't you come and join a consortium I'm putting together to buy Crawley Town FC, they're in the conference now but i'll have them in the world cup in 3 years I'm Tellin' ye, at that moment Foley's head exploded ! "feck sake" says roddy shot 28 feckin' times and he lives and now he goes and pop's his clog's right as he was going to come in on the crawley town deal Ah well guess I'll have to ask...........................
the Kilcoynes and Dunphy who immediately agreed and purchased Crawley Town and announced they were going to bring the club to play in the EL! Two weeks later, they changed their mind and sold the ground at a huge profit to a waste disposal outfit who turn the ground into an incinerator factory. Roddy got more frustrated and turned to...
paul osam who was sitting in the corner , what are we going to do paul , roddy said, all paul kept jibbering was "st pats" at which point trevor welch arrived on the scene and....................................
.... with an ill fitted sports jacket, began recounting his time as a boy in Cork where he was repeatedly...
...fed with....
..moronic sports clichés such as...
..."if I was in Pat Dolan's shoes, I'd have to.....