What's the most stupid/ dangerous thing you've ever done?

Leaving O'Sullivans bar in Paris on the Friday night before the Ireland game full as an egg to walk the 4 miles across the city back to my hotel. To this day I can't understand how I found my way back to the hotel, I remember thinking I was in Dublin and trying to figure out how to get to Rathmines. I met some amount of dodgy blokes and how I wasn't attacked or mugged I'll never know, got some great pictures on my camera though to piece the night together. The problem all started because of the queue for the drinks requiring three to be bought in one go and one drank by the time you got your change back. Happy memories though!

Didnt happen to me but one of my old roomates when he was in college. One evening he needed iron his shirt before going out, so he gets the iron out and turns it on to heat up, goes into the kitchen to get a snack, comes back out and tests the iron to see if it's hot.
Except he tested the iron with his tongue. He got a nasty burn, had to go to the hospital for meds etc.

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Originally Posted by Metrostars

tests the iron to see if it's hot.
Except he tested the iron with his tongue. He got a nasty burn, had to go to the hospital for meds etc.

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:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

Oh sweet Jesus.

1) Driving to Dublin for a match a few years ago in a Scenic, one of the passengers went "I wonder what it would be like to crash with these tray tables up"(the car has them flip up tables). I turned round to see what he was on about and ten seconds later I hit a car in front of me. Still got down in time for kick off though

2) Playing football in a school corrider, I slipped in a puddle of water, hit a filing cabinet at full pelt. Filing cabinet titled over and landed on me. Ended up in hospital for over a year with multiple leg fractures, broked ribs, and the rest

3) Chanting for the entirety of the Ireland v Albania game a few years back in Lansdowne. Keane got the winner near the end- I only discovered after the game that my lung had collapsed with the effort :)

4) Falling asleep with a reading lamp on, woke up to find the bed on fire. I had shifted the pillow in my sleep and and it had started to melt under the heat of the light, the bed then went on fire. Like PP, the doctor said another couple of minutes it could have been a whole lot worse

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Originally Posted by Maribor

1)

2) Playing football in a school corrider, I slipped in a puddle of water, hit a filing cabinet at full pelt. Filing cabinet titled over and landed on me. Ended up in hospital for over a year with multiple leg fractures, broked ribs, and the rest

3) Chanting for the entirety of the Ireland v Albania game a few years back in Lansdowne. Keane got the winner near the end- I only discovered after the game that my lung had collapsed with the effort :)

4) Falling asleep with a reading lamp on, woke up to find the bed on fire. I had shifted the pillow in my sleep and and it had started to melt under the heat of the light, the bed then went on fire. Like PP, the doctor said another couple of minutes it could have been a whole lot worse

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Holy Mother of God - I'm glad you're still with us Maribor. :eek: :eek:

One thing I'm always really wary of is electrical objects - it can be so fcuking easy for bloody things to overheat and catch fire - I don't care what precautions the experts tell us to take.

Brother in law bought a colour telly for the 1974 World Cup - after the WC ended he moved telly into the bedroom - it literally exploded/blazed up in a matter of seconds one night - flame soared up a corner of the bedroom and the Fire Brigade had to be called.

The most horrifying natural and beautiful thing all at one working in unison- nudity outside a certain station(and its not the train station) on Pearse Street :) envigourating

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Originally Posted by Flea

The most horrifying natural and beautiful thing all at one working in unison- nudity outside a certain station(and its not the train station) on Pearse Street :) envigourating

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I presume that's you Flea - like your namesake in TRHCPs - did you wear a big sock on your schlong??? :D

I tried on all the socks in Penneys but none would fit ;) so I decided on body paint I wasn't caught though

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Originally Posted by Flea

I tried on all the socks in Penneys but none would fit ;) so I decided on body paint I wasn't caught though

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:D :D :D

Not getting caught - that's the important bit. :D

Hell ye some poor bastrd got socks and an extra present for Christmas last :D

Hamish is off the head....

Most recent dumb thing, not a drop of drink involved just a touch of empty headness.....2 months ago I was in New York visiting my girlfriend, she was sharing a room on fifth avenue while she worked so I was staying there for a few days, one morning she went to work and told me when i get up to use the bathroom bring the key because the bedroom door locks behind you... of course I forgot this and went to have a shower with just a towel, all showered up anyway and realised i was locked out, I felt daft and tried to kick the door in, big sturdy mother ****er wouldn't budge so I had to go down to the reception in a pink towel and explain what happened but I wasn't allowed stay there in the first place so they had to call the manager whom i pleaded with to at least let me get my clothes, which he did after about 15 mins while a small crowd gathered, I felt like a real thick paddy walking up the stairs with the manager and security guard! :(

The Crazy Test

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Originally Posted by M@ttitude

Hamish is off the head....

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Hi M@ttitude - ya cheeky pup ya. :p
Nah - still a modicum of sanity left but just a modicum :D - just another tale of the troubles we males get into when the testosterone is flowing and common sense goes out the window - or, in my case, the passenger door.LOL
I'll bet lots more blokes can beat my above tale with even more bizzare tales.
Something similar to your story happened to me in a Galway hotel. I was staying in a Salthill with a lass (different one this time) and it had no en suite situation - bathroom was up the coridor. It was in the 80s, y'know. Ladyfriend went to the bathroom in the morning and I heard a knock at the door. Presumed she had locked herself out and when, totally au natural, I opened the door, I was confronted with a rather oldish lady (hotel staff member) delivering our (pre-ordered) breakfast.
Obviously she was used to this situation as she didn't bat an eyelid - "Here's your breakfast, love", was all she said. I could only laugh. :D

Still, I'd better delete "The Boghole Incident" though as in this PC world some Footie ladies might consider parts of it a tad rude. Swear to God, it's a true story though.

BTW I got "You're a picture of sanity, how dull you're life must be" in The Crazy Test. :D Kinda disappointed - that proves the test is BS.LOL

Here's a few from the top of my head:

• Drinking Holy Water from Lourdes - sick as a dog for days. I wonder can it tell if you are a non-believer?

• Eating a leaf from a tree in the centre of Glasgow - if you must browse from a tree try and stay away from ones with shiny leaves.

• Licking the top of a magic mushroom air freshener "to see what it tasted like"

• Complaining that the curry I had ordered wasn't hot enough....

• ****ing in a doorway that just happened to be a side entrance to Strathclyde Police's HQ. At least they saw the funny side of it and let me off with a warning.

• Getting the family up at the crack of dawn to go to Lego Land. I managed to get on the wrong train and would up in Windsor. I'm still not allowed to forget that.

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Originally Posted by Jim Smith

Here's a few from the top of my head:

• Drinking Holy Water from Lourdes - sick as a dog for days. I wonder can it tell if you are a non-believer?

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Yep Jim - you're doomed to the fires of hell. LOL :D

I think it's a great idea to publicly, for want of a better word, cleanse ourselves and publicly confess our past.er.....diversions. Shows we're all human and I tend to think our daft actions in the past display that we're very colourful people here in Footieland.
Who said internet folks are nerds?

Just after the pope's visit in 1979, a good of friend was driving his then girlfriend to a quiet spot after a disco. Well, she couldn't wait and started to give him a BJ as he drove - I wonder is that breaking the law the same as using mobile phones?
He drove into a Gardai checkpoint but did it stop yer one - not a bit of it.
The cops were laughing so much they waved him on - only when the girl heard the cops laughing/talking did she come up for air. :eek:
Soon as they passed the checkpoint, off she goes again.
I thought the pope's visit inspired a new wave of religiosity in the country - yeh right. :rolleyes:
I went out with her for a short spell a year or so after he broke up with her but never encountered a Gardai checkpoint. :D

once a upon myself and some friends rented out a villa in ibiza, after coming back one morning from a night on the tiles, a friend had taken a crazy ass swedish girl back to his room for a bit lurve , in our silly drunkness we thought it would be a good idea to climb up on the roof with the camcorder and video tape it through the sky light in the attic room he was staying in needless to say we were less coherent than what we thought we were and in my drunkiness i feel in the window on top of them breaking her collar bone and my wrist and foot , ah the memorys

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Originally Posted by exile

i feel in the window on top of them breaking her collar bone and my wrist and foot , ah the memorys

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Jeez, exile, there's a safer version of a threesome than that. :eek:

I'll ask it again, why is it that rumpy pumpy get us lads in to such trouble??

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Originally Posted by sirhamish

Jeez, exile, there's a safer version of a threesome than that. :eek:

I'll say it again, sex and young lads is a dangerous mixture. :D

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i was a pariah at the wedding after the best mans speech apperntly swedes learn english at a very young age , i was only told afterwards they just didnt want to talk to a crazy ass irish man :D

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we were less coherent than what we thought we were and in my drunkiness i feel in the window on top of them breaking her collar bone and my wrist and foot , ah the memorys

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Classic, how did you explain that one at home?? and what did she do?? she must have went mad. my mates would go spa if i did something like that.

Ah but POS and Exile, the good thing is that we can laugh at these now. :D

What is it in us blokes that makes us do these things? I know alcohol is involved but........???

It's a wonder any bloke has a stag party - you just know someone will tie him naked to a lamp-post or put a ferret down his trousers.

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Originally Posted by paul_oshea

Classic, how did you explain that one at home?? and what did she do?? she must have went mad. my mates would go spa if i did something like that.

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after she got over the shock and the intial pain she proceeded to get up and start kicking me while i was on the floor but they ended up getting married so all is good :D

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Originally Posted by exile

after she got over the shock and the intial pain she proceeded to get up and start kicking me while i was on the floor but they ended up getting married so all is good :D

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She must have been a strong lass to give you a kicking while she suffered the pain of a broken collar bone.

Is she talking to you these days, Exile??? :D - probably from a distance. :D

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Originally Posted by sirhamish

She must have been a strong lass to give you a kicking while she suffered the pain of a broken collar bone.

Is she talking to you these days, Exile??? :D - probably from a distance. :D

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oh no belive me she was in pain she was actualy crying but ya know when you bang your elbow or head of something and you want turn around and knock the sh1te out of someone it was kinda of like that . but we get on famously know and i just bought a house in greystones with her cousin :D

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Originally Posted by exile

oh no belive me she was in pain she was actualy crying but ya know when you bang your elbow or head of something and you want turn around and knock the sh1te out of someone it was kinda of like that . but we get on famously know and i just bought a house in greystones with her cousin :D

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Glad to hear it Exile - time's agreat healer but I'd say she shakes your hand from a distance.

Good luck with the new house in Greystones - now I know why you call yourself exile.

Thankingfully this didn't lead to long term damage but is a warning to all men about drinking in the afternoon...

I was having a few pints in Camden one beautiful sunny, Sunday afternoon, left the pub and I had the three urges that most people do after drinking a load and the pubs still being open, that is; a feed, a pee and another pint!

So I got chips in pitta with lashings of chilli sauce from the chippy next to the tube station in Camden, (this chippy has perhaps the hottest in norf landaaan) wolfed it down without the aid of anything as lightweight as a those wee plastic/wooden forks they give you, strolled into the Halfway House across the road ordered a pint and went to the toilet, now you see having had a large amount of lager before I didn't consider washing my hands before I went for a slash and had only really wiped the excess chilli sauce of my paws with a non absorbant tissue.

The sense of burning in that area took about a minute to start but before I was at the bar it felt like a fire was going on in my trousers, and not in that way either :eek: . Oh how the bar man laughed when I explained the look on my face and then proceeeded to tell everyone who came to the bar why I was looking the way I was particularly the lovely ladyezzzzzz.

I have since recovered but the menory lingers on.

(Paul, I told you one day I'd share the story with the world ;))

Most Dangerous was probably when I was on camp with the FCA and tried to unscrew the flash eliminator on top of my rifle with my teeth :eek:

As for most stupid thing I ever done I think her name was Sarah :D

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Originally Posted by Lim till i die

As for most stupid thing I ever done I think her name was Sarah

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:D :D :D

One of my mad episodes involved falling asleep with a burning candle on top of a wooden cabinet :eek: I woke the next morning :eek: , still alive thank God :D to see a big black ringed hole in the cabinet with the wax over the carpet, how it didn't go on fire I'll never know. I wasn't even drunk, just tired after a long journey...... :o

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Originally Posted by M@ttitude

The Crazy Test

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"You probably suffer from mild mental illness, making you perfectly normal. 3 out of 4 people in the world suffer from mental illness, so that's how I judge "normal". "

:eek: :eek:

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Originally Posted by Pat O' Banton

Thankingfully this didn't lead to long term damage but is a warning to all men about drinking in the afternoon...

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I am not for a single second surprised that you should produce such a magnificent story. "Red Hot Chilli Willy" is thus born, and may he a long life have! :D

:ball: PP

Chasing my next door neighbour with a stanley knife and the throwing it at my dog when I was 5

Jumping over a small wall in Bundoran Co.Donegal which led to the edge of a cliff when I was about 6 or 7 :eek:

After being locked in my shed, in roetrospect deciding to punch the shed window (aided by a slight loss of balance) was a pretty stupid/dangerous thing. The doctor who stitched me up said that an inch more to the right and things would have been musch worse. Still laugh when I think back to it though, me running in circles around the garden with blood pumping outta my wrist, screaming ``Sh*t, I broke the shed window, Dad's gonna kill me.... I broke the shed window... I broke the shed window window.... Dad's gonna kill me..... I broke the shed window`` (70% sure they were my actual words). Think I was 9 or so then. A few years older and a bit wiser ( ;) ) I dont think I'd do the same again if in a similiar situation........ Dont think so I said :eek: .

Other than that incident I've got a good record................... ;)

chasing after someone in the playground when I was 11, before catching my foot on someones skipping rope, going to fast to stop, so slid across the newly tarmaced playground on my hands kness and face :eek:
not pretty and bloody hurt.

Doing the gold level Duke of Edinburgh award scheme, wild camping and a 50 mile walk in wales, messing up my foot, and being too stubborn to go and see the doctor for 3 days, and whan i finally went, finding out Id ruptured my achilles tendon and was bleeding internally. Nice :rolleyes: Only to do the same thing to the other leg a year later :o

Acting the clown ice skating with my cousin who was 6, pretending to fall etc. only to realise later id chipped a bone in my elbow during one of my "fake" falls :o

scariest thing ever was being in a car that caught fire on the M1 while we were in it. :eek:

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Paul, I told you one day I'd share the story with the world

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i was reading that thinking i had already read it on here, but ya i was going to tell it sooner rather than later if you hadnt. LOL :D

Just last Thursday, I jumped off a landrover (standing on the outside footplate) at 20mph. Got as good a landing as could be expected and a nice roll, so only took out a bit of me knee and was straight back up. The car behind us was a bit alarmed though! :eek: :p
Have also burnt my hand when falling on a Go-Kart exhaust and split open between two fingers falling over those trees in the main street of Ballybofey while running to get into the pub and out of the rain. Carried on into the pub and ordered a pint of Bulmers and a first aid kit! :) Don't think I ever convinced the doctors the next day that I hadn't been drinking at the time of the fall though!

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Originally Posted by Plastic Paddy

I am not for a single second surprised that you should produce such a magnificent story. "Red Hot Chilli Willy" is thus born, and may he a long life have! :D

:ball: PP

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You wouldn't be wishing it a long life it happened to you :eek: :D

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Originally Posted by pineapple stu

and split open between two fingers falling over those trees in the main street of Ballybofey while running to get into the pub and out of the rain

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Regular occurence that, mate :cool: :o

I got my hand stuck in a car-lock thing for the steering wheel. Ouch!The memory makes me wince to this day.

Sitting on an ant hill when i was about 8, that wasn't a good idea, and about a week later decieding to go commando, forgeting to watch out for my foreskin in the zipper :eek: !!! Lucky no lasting damage ;)

Both happened in Donegal, it seemed everytime I went there as a kid something happened me!

This doesn't involve me but it's still a funny/stupid story...

My cousin was on holiday in Spain in '94 or '95 and he was getting alot of attention cos he looks kinda like Roy Keane and being from South Kerry he has a similar accent.

Anyway, after one encounter with a girl who was convinced he was actually Roy Keane he said to her that after the Charity Shield, which was about a week away, he'd wave to the cameras as he went up the steps at Wembley.

When the Charity Shield came around, my cousin was watching it and at the end of the match Roy Keane went up to collect his medal and waved to the cameras!!!! :D

He's a family legend!