Greek Immigration Officer - "Name please ?"
- "Angela Merkel"
Greek Immigration Officer - "Occupation ?"
- "No, just here for a few days."
Printable View
Greek Immigration Officer - "Name please ?"
- "Angela Merkel"
Greek Immigration Officer - "Occupation ?"
- "No, just here for a few days."
Robbie Keane said he was delighted to meet President Obama in the White House. He's supported him since he was a boy.
My mate set me up on a blind date.
He said, "She's a lovely girl, but there's something you should know... She's expecting a baby."
I felt like a right flipping idiot waiting in the pub wearing nothing but a nappy.
I'm currently writing a book about my love of dogs and gardening. It's called b*tches & hoes.
I met my girlfriend speed dating
we both had a lot of explaining to do
Saw a fella carrying a ladder the other day...you should have seen what he got up too.
Definition of Pressure:
a wife
a mistress
and a mortgage
all one month late
For a laugh with a few mates Chuck Norris peed into the petrol tank of a lorry. The lorry became known after that day Optimus Prime
Man walks into a fishmongers with a large Salmon under his arm.
"Do you do fishcakes?" - ask's the man.
"We do yeah?" - replies the fishmonger.
"Well can you do one for this fella - he's 2 today".
The young Chinese swimming ace,Ye Shiwen, was asked if the she'd take a gender test following her two gold medals at the Olympics. "I will in me ballix", she replied!
after seeing a photgraph of RVP and his wife, Ryan Giggs has vowed to treat him like a brother
Top Ten from Edinburgh Fringe ....
1) "You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks." – Stewart Francis
2) "Last night me and my girlfriend watched three DVDs back to back. Luckily I was the one facing the telly." – Tim Vine
3) "I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister." – Will Marsh
4) "You know you're working class when your TV is bigger than your book case." – Rob Beckett
5) "I'm good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet … I don't know Y." – Chris Turner
6) "I took part in the sun tanning Olympics - I just got Bronze." – Tim Vine
7) "Pornography is often frowned upon, but that's only because I'm concentrating." – George Ryegold
8 ) "I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together. Riveting!" – Stewart Francis
9) "I waited an hour for my starter so I complained: 'It's not rocket salad." – Lou Sanders
10) "My mum's so pessimistic, that if there was an Olympics for pessimism … she wouldn't fancy her chances." – Nish Kumar
not a joke but sill very funny. enjoy
https://www.facebook.com/sminkyanimation
After watching all those shorts. Class...
But this one made me guffaw.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSO9...layer_embedded
This is a classic. Can't believe I've gone so long without seeing it again.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E4ovvsUG-KY&feature=related