Printable View
Bought my son an iPad, and my daughter an iPod. The wife got me an iPhone, and I got her an iRon.... She wasn't exactly overjoyed even after I explained it can be intergrated with the iWash, iCook and iClean network. This opened the iNag reminder service which totally wiped out the iShag function.
strangeirish that reminds me Apple were going to bring out a handset for children but changed their minds when the Marketing Dept named it "I Touch-Kids".
Alex McLeish quit over transfers. Carson Yeung said to him "Wa yu wan faw playas in suma Awex?" ,
McLeish replied "6 defenders".
Yeung came back with Marlon King.
"I said 6 defenders, not sex offenders".
a lot of effort for an average joke but it gets my thanks anyway!
Some of my friends saw an old fella racing away from town today on his tractor, saying the world was going to end
They said it was Farmer Gedden.
__________________
There is a lot of fuss over here in the UK with the Labour Party leadership and talk of the merits of the Millibands.
You have to feel sorry for Steve, he might be the forgotton brother but I havent seen Ed or David write a song like Abracadabra yet.
________________
I was driving home the other night from a meal out, the police pulled me over and said,
"Sir are you aware your wife fell out of the car at the lights 3 miles back up the road?"
I said, "Thank god for that, I thought I was going deaf"
If you're ever in the market for a blow up doll, go for the Muslim ones.
They blow themselves up
...but avoid the talking ones. They're programmed to ask: "does my bomb look big in this?"Quote:
Originally Posted by Deckydee
What don't you want to feel at a proctogolist exam? Two hands on your shoulders..
My brother lost both his legs in Afganistan.
I can imagine he is feeling pretty low right now.
Do homeless people understand "knock knock" jokes?
What do you call a Russian man with 3 testicles?
Hujanikabollokov
What do you call a Russian who is always scratching his groin?Quote:
Originally Posted by BonnieShels
Ivan Itchyc*ck
I presume u meant Ugenick Debalakov - not that jumbled up word you posted!Quote:
Originally Posted by BonnieShels
Happy Independence day America!,
or, as it is known in Britain,
"the day they decided that they'd rather keep India"...
Just heard the World Innuendo Championship is starting next week. I'm thinking of entering my sister.