Funny metaphors

These are metaphors from last years Leaving Cert essays....

* Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two other
sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

* His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like
underpants in a tumble dryer.

* The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a
bowling ball
wouldn't.

* McMurphy fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a paper bag
filled with vegetable soup.

* Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.

* Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the
centre

* Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

* He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.

* The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you
fry them in hot grease.

* Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across
the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left
Cork at 6:36 p.m. travelling at 55 mph, the other from Dublin at 4:19 p.m.
at a speed of 35 mph.

* The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the full stop after the
Dr. on a Dr Pepper can.

* John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had
also never met.

* The thunder was ominous sounding, much like the sound of a thin
sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene
in a play.

* The red brick wall was the colour of a brick-red crayon.

* Even in his last years, Grandpa had a mind like a steel trap, only
one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut.

* The plan was simple, like my brother Phil. But unlike Phil, this
plan just might
work.


* The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not
eating for a while.

* Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts
heaving like a student on 31p-a-pint night.

* He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck either, but
a real duck that was
actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.


* She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes
just before it throws up.

* The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and
extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a lamppost.

* It was a working class tradition, like fathers chasing kids around
with
their power tools.

* He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells,
as if she were a dustcart reversing.

* She was as easy as the Daily Star crossword.

* She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.

* Her voice had that tense, grating quality, like a first-generation
hermal paper fax machine that needed a band tightened.

* It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it
to the wall.

"Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts
heaving like a student on 31p-a-pint night. "

Hehe.........what feckin essay titles are they giving the kids these days?

".......the sea lay far away like a far away sea...."

Write a personal response to the title: "Love in the time of Swashbuckling."