Ricos Motivational half-time speech

From soccercentral

“I’m contiguous with the current situation,
And know you’re quite endemically nonplussed.
This outbreak of inherent sternutation
Is caused by a preponderance of dust.

‘But our interdepartmental choreography
Is obfuscated by this contretemps.
We’ll ameliorate the training ground’s topography,
And garner approbation at a romp.

‘A deipnosophist is how some might describe me,
And claim I should have been a bouquiniste.
Such unctuous commentators might ascribe me
An irenic quidnunc, to say the least.

‘My tenets might be sanguine and loquacious,
And sedulous of literary digestion.
Yet I can be fatidic and loquacious –
Now, anybody want to ask a question?”

that would work wonders

1 speech like that and i'd make sure i'd play great from then on so i'd never have to hear it again :D

I bought a Rico-English dictionary this morning and translated the script from Risteard. It goes like this:

Paragraph's 1 & 2:
I'm pi$$ed off with the effort ye're making. Ye're prancin' around like a bunch of Nancy Boys and if ye don't get stuck in I'm gonna kick seven shades o' $hit out o' ye at Monday nights training!

Paragraph's 3 & 4:
I may appear to be a reasonable type of guy but, by fcuk, if anyone crosses me they'll see another side o' me. Now, we're gonna win this fcukin' League this year no matter what others think.
Anybody wanna' question me on THAT? ;)