I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the
> > morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
> > Frank Sinatra
> >
> > You know you're drunk when you fall off the floor.
> >
> > And God said, "Let there be vodka!" And He saw that it was good. Then
> > God said, "Let there be light!" And then He said, "Whoa - too much
light."
> >
> > You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
> > Dean Martin
> >
> > Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 1862!
> >
> > To some its a six-pack, to me it's a support Group
> >
> > The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk,they're
> > sober.
> > William Butler Yeats
> >
> > Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
> > Catherine Zandonella
> >
> > Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol.
> > Anonymous
> >
> > A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank
> > her.
> > W.C. Fields
> >
> > What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
> > Tee Mans
> >
> > When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
> > Henny Youngman
> >
> > Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of
> > The time and have the time of your life.
> > Michelle Mastrolacasa
> >
> > I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.
> > Tom Waits
> >
> > 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
> > Stephen Wright
> >
> > You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It
> > Helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons,
> > but At the very least you need a beer.
> > Frank Zappa
> >
> > Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has
> > Taken out of me.
> > Winston Churchill
> >
> > To beer, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.
> > Homer J. Simpson
> >
> > Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
> > Benjamin Franklin
> >
> > If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it
> > Makes beer shoot out your nose.
> > Deep Thought, Jack Handy
> >
> > Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is
> > beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but
> > the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
> > Dave Barry
> >
> > Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
> > Kaiser Wilhelm
> >
> >
> > Beer - Because one doesn't solve the world's problems over white wine!
> > Brent Roper
> >
> > It is my personal mission statement in life to drink and misbehave on an
> > epic scale!
> > Where am I? Who am I? Most importantly who's round is it?
> > Neil Howlett
> >
> > Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed.
> > Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery
and
> > all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might
be
> > out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself,
"It
> > is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be
> > Selfish and worry about my liver."
> > Jack Handy
