Pauro 76
28/02/2002, 12:57 PM
The collected writings of the Simpsons from the chalkboard exercises that Bart writes during the opening credits.
>I will not carve gods.
******* <LI>I will not spank others.
******* <LI>I will not aim for the head.
******* <LI>I will not barf unless I'm sick
******* <LI>I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty.
******* <LI>I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge.
******* <LI>I will not conduct my own fire drills.
******* <LI>Funny noises are not funny.
******* <LI>I will not snap bras.
******* <LI>I will not fake seizures.
******* <LI>This punishment is not boring and pointless.
******* <LI>My name is not Dr. Death.
******* <LI>I will not defame New Orleans.
******* <LI>I will not prescribe medication.
******* <LI>I will not bury the new kid.
******* <LI>I will not teach others to fly.
******* <LI>I will not bring sheep to class.
******* <LI>A burp is not an answer.
******* <LI>Teacher is not a leper.
******* <LI>Coffee is not for kids.
******* <LI>I will not eat things for money.
******* <LI>I will not yell "She's Dead" at roll call.
******* <LI>The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee.
******* <LI>I will not call the principal "spud head".
******* <LI>Goldfish don't bounce.
******* <LI>Mud is not one of the 4 food groups.
******* <LI>No one is interested in my underpants.
******* <LI>I will not sell miracle cures.
******* <LI>I will return the seeing-eye dog.
******* <LI>I do not have diplomatic immunity.
******* <LI>I will not charge admission to the bathroom.
******* <LI>I will never win an emmy.
******* <LI>The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy.
******* <LI>All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy.
******* <LI>I will not say "Springfield" just to get applause.
******* <LI>I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers.
******* <LI>My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man.
******* <LI>I will not go near the kindergarten turtle.
******* <LI>I am not deliciously saucy.
******* <LI>Organ transplants are best left to professionals.
******* <LI>The Pledge of Allegiance does not end with "Hail Satan".
******* <LI>I will not celebrate meaningless milestones.
******* <LI>There are plenty of businesses like show business.
******* <LI>Five days is not too long to wait for a gun.
******* <LI>I will not waste chalk.
******* <LI>I will not skateboard in the halls.
******* <LI>I will not instigate revolution.
******* <LI>I will not draw naked ladies in class.
******* <LI>I did not see Elvis.
******* <LI>I will not call my teacher "Hot Cakes".
******* <LI>Garlic gum is not funny.
******* <LI>They are laughing at me, not with me.
******* <LI>I will not yell "Fire" in a crowded classroom.
******* <LI>I will not encourage others to fly.
******* <LI>I will not fake my way through life.
******* <LI>Tar is not a plaything.
******* <LI>I will not Xerox my butt.
******* <LI>It's potato, not potatoe.
******* <LI>I will not trade pants with others.
******* <LI>I am not a 32 year old woman.
******* <LI>I will not do that thing with my tongue.
******* <LI>I will not drive the principal's car.
******* <LI>I will not pledge allegiance to Bart.
******* <LI>I will not sell school property.
******* <LI>I will not burp in class.
******* <LI>I will not cut corners.
******* <LI>I will not get very far with this attitude.
******* <LI>I will not belch the National Anthem.
******* <LI>I will not sell land in Florida.
******* <LI>I will not grease the monkey bars.
******* <LI>I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment.
******* <LI>I will not do anything bad ever again.
******* <LI>I will not show off.
******* <LI>I will not sleep through my education.
******* <LI>I am not a dentist.
******* <LI>Spitwads are not free speech.
******* <LI>Nobody likes sunburn slappers.
******* <LI>High explosives and school don't mix.
******* <LI>I will not bribe Principal Skinner.
******* <LI>I will not squeak chalk.
******* <LI>I will finish what I sta
******* <LI>"Bart Bucks" are not legal tender.
******* <LI>Underwear should be worn on the inside.
******* <LI>The Christmas Pageant does not stink.
******* <LI>I will not torment the emotionally frail.
>I will not carve gods.
******* <LI>I will not spank others.
******* <LI>I will not aim for the head.
******* <LI>I will not barf unless I'm sick
******* <LI>I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty.
******* <LI>I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge.
******* <LI>I will not conduct my own fire drills.
******* <LI>Funny noises are not funny.
******* <LI>I will not snap bras.
******* <LI>I will not fake seizures.
******* <LI>This punishment is not boring and pointless.
******* <LI>My name is not Dr. Death.
******* <LI>I will not defame New Orleans.
******* <LI>I will not prescribe medication.
******* <LI>I will not bury the new kid.
******* <LI>I will not teach others to fly.
******* <LI>I will not bring sheep to class.
******* <LI>A burp is not an answer.
******* <LI>Teacher is not a leper.
******* <LI>Coffee is not for kids.
******* <LI>I will not eat things for money.
******* <LI>I will not yell "She's Dead" at roll call.
******* <LI>The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee.
******* <LI>I will not call the principal "spud head".
******* <LI>Goldfish don't bounce.
******* <LI>Mud is not one of the 4 food groups.
******* <LI>No one is interested in my underpants.
******* <LI>I will not sell miracle cures.
******* <LI>I will return the seeing-eye dog.
******* <LI>I do not have diplomatic immunity.
******* <LI>I will not charge admission to the bathroom.
******* <LI>I will never win an emmy.
******* <LI>The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy.
******* <LI>All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy.
******* <LI>I will not say "Springfield" just to get applause.
******* <LI>I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers.
******* <LI>My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man.
******* <LI>I will not go near the kindergarten turtle.
******* <LI>I am not deliciously saucy.
******* <LI>Organ transplants are best left to professionals.
******* <LI>The Pledge of Allegiance does not end with "Hail Satan".
******* <LI>I will not celebrate meaningless milestones.
******* <LI>There are plenty of businesses like show business.
******* <LI>Five days is not too long to wait for a gun.
******* <LI>I will not waste chalk.
******* <LI>I will not skateboard in the halls.
******* <LI>I will not instigate revolution.
******* <LI>I will not draw naked ladies in class.
******* <LI>I did not see Elvis.
******* <LI>I will not call my teacher "Hot Cakes".
******* <LI>Garlic gum is not funny.
******* <LI>They are laughing at me, not with me.
******* <LI>I will not yell "Fire" in a crowded classroom.
******* <LI>I will not encourage others to fly.
******* <LI>I will not fake my way through life.
******* <LI>Tar is not a plaything.
******* <LI>I will not Xerox my butt.
******* <LI>It's potato, not potatoe.
******* <LI>I will not trade pants with others.
******* <LI>I am not a 32 year old woman.
******* <LI>I will not do that thing with my tongue.
******* <LI>I will not drive the principal's car.
******* <LI>I will not pledge allegiance to Bart.
******* <LI>I will not sell school property.
******* <LI>I will not burp in class.
******* <LI>I will not cut corners.
******* <LI>I will not get very far with this attitude.
******* <LI>I will not belch the National Anthem.
******* <LI>I will not sell land in Florida.
******* <LI>I will not grease the monkey bars.
******* <LI>I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment.
******* <LI>I will not do anything bad ever again.
******* <LI>I will not show off.
******* <LI>I will not sleep through my education.
******* <LI>I am not a dentist.
******* <LI>Spitwads are not free speech.
******* <LI>Nobody likes sunburn slappers.
******* <LI>High explosives and school don't mix.
******* <LI>I will not bribe Principal Skinner.
******* <LI>I will not squeak chalk.
******* <LI>I will finish what I sta
******* <LI>"Bart Bucks" are not legal tender.
******* <LI>Underwear should be worn on the inside.
******* <LI>The Christmas Pageant does not stink.
******* <LI>I will not torment the emotionally frail.