I strenuously object to your use of a live chicken in your self-beating. I realise that this may have been an attempt at humour but is setting a very poor example to impressionable younger fans.
Poultry are our friends.
I demand that you desist from using live creatures in any way in connection with your body. If we can send people to de space station surely a flagellation-friendly psuedo-chicken can be created. It is your penance to search out such an object and whip yourself twice nightly for a 5 decades or until City do de quadruple (which ever comes quickest).
May de lord have mercy on your soul...
10/01/2002, 5:53 PM
This public service announcement was brought to you by the letter 'G', and the number '3'. And the Pats decision was wrong.
yea and I strenuously object to your inapropriate use of a Seasme Street idea..
Everybody knows that public service announcements are brought to you by the letter 'S' and the number 8
methinks you were getting it mixed up with something else..
ha ha egg on your face, who looks the fool now adam :D
11/01/2002, 11:25 AM
Derm, I'll have you know that the chickens are dew-picked in Ghana by nubile teenagers between the ages of 17 and 17 1/2; shipped directly to the finest chicken trainers in Miama, Florida, who spend 6 hours a day educating them on the finer points of being used as a beating implement, after which the chickens are allowed several hours on the strip for R&R; and then flown first-class to Cork to be used to beat humourous Foot.ie posters only by highly-trained and well-paid chicken beaters sourced directly by Foot.ie staff. The chickens enjoy the work immensely, and are paid the finest wage in the land.
James, the letter 'S' is on sabbatical at Harvard University, lecturing on the correct use of itself on Sesame Street, because of blatant abuse. The number '8' has moved to Havana and is happily married to a retired beating chicken. They have three lovely children, the letter 'A', the number '6', and an aardvark named Kevin. We wish them the best of luck in their attempts to overthrow Castro.
14/01/2002, 12:59 AM
Chicken Beating can seriously damage you health !! At a recent convention in Brussels, top scientists have claimed that their findings dictate that every stroke of aggression, either to oneself or another person, from the chicken can result in lowering ones life expectancy, in some cases it is described as "dramatically" especially if it is the claws or beak that inflict the most lacerations. "They are beating themselves to within an inch of their lives" one physician has informed us, This is a practice that has become more perpetual of late, alarmingly so, it is more common with certain groups in our society, namely "Football fans", "Internet junkies" and "Corkonians", gatherings have been seen in and around the Queens Old Castle in Cork, more research is being done to find out the longer, more harmful effects of the practice. These findings shall be made available in the popular weekly "Medical Practitioner digest". watch this space .... :D